You’re welcome. Happy Monday morning! Due to a tragic laundering error involving a potty-training* toddler’s underwear and the family’s general laundry comingling in the dark recesses of my washing machine, I went to the gym the other day smelling like… At first I couldn’t figure it out as the scent of fecal matter was …
This, my friends, is the Rear Naked Choke in action. (I think, feel free to correct me if it isn’t.) Clearly Golem in front is not amused but the guy in back is totally laughing. See? Funny. The Rear Naked Choke Hold came back to haunt me tonight. There I was, sitting in on a …
Read more “Head Butts and Yoga Butts: What works in the gym, doesn’t always work out of the gym”
No actual numbers were harmed (or used) in the making of this post. While I do discuss my eating disordered history, I’ve tried to keep triggers to a minimum and if you are suffering from an eating disorder I would actually encourage you to keep reading. This is my message of hope. If I can …
Read more “I Finally Figured Out Why My Jeans Fit Funny [Me vs. My Numbers. I Win!]”
The broom method! Haven’t tried that one yet! Ladies: I have big news! Gents: I have a huge overshare! So consider yourselves informed and warned. I got my Mirena IUD out. For everyone who is not breathlessly following the status of my uterus (can’t imagine why), the Mirena is an intra-uterine device that prevents pregnancy …
Read more “My Mirena IUD is Gone! [Why I did it and What’s Happened Since]”
I so need this shirt. Tonsils. Appendix. A chunk of my uterus. Several weird tumor-cyst thingies that had teeth and hair (no joke). I don’t want to brag or anything but I pretty much have no expendable organs left. This makes me either super evolved (although I still have my pinky toes…) or the life-size …
Actually, she’s wearing white pants and as anyone knows you can’t have your period and wear white pants at the same time. Or ride white horses. Or play tennis in a white tennis dress. I’m guessing she’s the girl whose babysitter showed her Jaws at age 5. “Hormonal” is not generally seen as a compliment. …
Why did the Tupperware Fairy never become A Thing? Come on, she’s awesome! And – zing! – just found my next Halloween costume. They should have given her a Tupperware Tiara though. I could pretend that I got really backed up on my e-mail because I’m just that popular or I could ‘fess up to …
Read more “How Do You Time Your Meals Around Your Workouts? [Help a reader out week!]”
Fact: 70-75% of how you experience flavor is due to your sense of smell. Anecdote: A friend told me about a friend (isn’t this how all good anecdotes start?) who had lost his sense of smell in an accident and consequently lost 20 pounds easy-peasey because, in my friend’s words, “Everything pretty much tasted the …
Read more “How Smell Influences Taste (And how to use that to your advantage)”
This is pretty much how I felt after an hour of having my head turned upside down, in more ways that one. Dr. Dan* was not at all what I expected. Like all good friendships and all bad screenplays, it started over polite chit-chat at a party. Somehow (probably because I am a chronic oversharer?) …
Read more “Jaw Clenching, Acupressure and One of the Strangest Experiences I’ve Ever Had”
Maxipad slippers!! If only I had thought to Google “hilarious maxi pad gifts” before I gave the Gym Buddies their presents! Ah well, there’s always next year… (Image and idea courtesy of Homemade Gifts Made Easy.) Who gives their friends panty liners for Christmas? I do! And I would have given them the panties to …
Read more “The Emergency Gym Survival Kit: My Holiday Gift to the Gym Buddies”
