When our trainer said he was going to use the TRX to whip us into shape, I didn’t think he meant literally: What I love about this picture:1. ATTACK OF THE HUGE HAND! Run! Hide the children! 2. The fact that I am concentrating so hard – as evidenced by my durn-all-these-new-fangled-contraptions-and-their-tiny-buttons facial expression – …
“Jumpstart YOUR metabolism with a wheaties breakfast!” Eating cereal boosts your metabolism! It must be true – it’s right there on the box! PS> Where is their mother?! I’m doing everything right and it’s not working! If you have ever thought the aforementioned – usually cried in paroxysms of grief after an unfortunate run-in with …
Read more “The Slow Metabolism: Fact or Myth [Research Porn!]”
Yes, I’ve used this picture twice on this site before but that is just how deeply I love this dude. I have titled it “Awesome Sauce.” I think he may be the patron saint of the GFE! Bikram kickboxing – you many not have heard of doing kickboxing in a super heated room before but …
Read more “The Fitness Trend I Wish Would Make a Comeback [The Sweaty Bangs Problem]”
What does it say about me that I really want that dress? Except in green, please. They can keep the plastic barrettes though. “You’re prettier but she’s way sexier.” Thus started one of the worst back-handed compliments I’ve ever received. “She just knows how to use what she’s got. You’re… kinda spastic.” The speaker was …
Oh this? Just a one-handed bar push up. No biggie. Couple more reps and you can go back to hanging by your knees. Pansies. “Kettlebells…” That right there would have been enough to grab my attention but then he added, “IN THE POOL.” It was as if someone had shouted “Fox just un-cancelled Firefly!” at …
What I’m about to tell you is going to make me very unpopular*. (Never mind that I spent so much time being unpopular in high school that it is pretty much my natural state of being.) You know that old weight lifting trope “Don’t fear the heavy weights; women don’t have enough testosterone to get …
Metallica is performing live and center stage in mouth right now. And I’m not talking the stadium rocking from their glory days. No, my tongue tastes like the puke-covered floor under a mosh pit teeming with 200 sweaty dudes crammed into a third-tier club that hasn’t washed their floors since Slash last washed his hair. …
Read more “Your Health Food is Trying to Kill You, Part 2 [Attack of the Pine Nuts]”
A mother’s love – they say that nothing is more powerful. (At least if you believe Harry Potter, which of course I do. I’m a sucker for green eyes.) So if this is true then I know the second most powerful force on the planet: A mother’s guilt. Whether they hand it to you as …
Read more “Can Exercise Hurt Your Breast Milk? [A Study in Mother Guilt]”
I’m not just excited, I’m Richard-Simmons excited!! Great news: I just found out (thanks to several of you astute readers!) that my book is available for pre-order on Amazon! Woohoooo! I can’t even tell you how amazing it feels to write that sentence. This process has taken nearly two years but it’s finally happening. And …
Crunchy. Bland. A cross between birdseed and the neon orange salmon roe they roll sushi in. (Question: those eggs are dyed right? Salmon can’t possibly have neon orange eggs can they?? Or do they just make them that color so they’re easier to spot when all 200 of them get caught in your teeth? That’s …
