Oh I have SO done this!! But baggies are a pain. I discovered when my kids were infants that those little formula measuring plastic containers were perfect for holding the right serving of protein powder and they’re made for pouring into bottles!
Clandestine labs. Secret testing. Underground smuggling rings. But this crystalline powder wasn’t being sold on a street corner but rather at Wal-Mart, GNC and other mainstream retailers. And yet Craze – deemed supplement of the year by BodyBuilding.com – may have more in common with street-corner meth than with the protein powders and vitamins it currently shares a shelf with. At the end of last year Japanese scientists announced the discovery of a “methamphetamine-like compound”, N,alpha-diethylphenylethylamine (NADEP), in the hugely popular workout supplement and scientists in four other countries confirmed it in their own tests. (And now we know why it’s so highly rated! Speeeeeeed! Whee!) The company has temporarily stopped production to look into the claims.
“Note to Mothers: Play safe with your young ones – make sure they get sugar every day.” Egads… P.S. I want to watusi too!!
The next time you’re tempted to mindlessly eat handfuls of chocolate chips or order the extra large soda with dinner or drink syrup straight from the bottle (which… I can’t really judge you for because real maple syrup is delightful), instead science wants you to think about making baby-nuggets with your cousin. Because nothing will pull you out of a junk food binge like imagining sexy times with the kid with whom you not only share grandpa’s nose but also shared the Summer of Boogers.
In what has got to be the best quote by a researcher ever, Dr. Wayne Potts, a biology professor and senior author of a new study about the effects of the “recommended amount” of sugar on mice, opined, “Would you rather be on the American diet … or have parents be full cousins?” In case you aren’t already totally squicked out, he added, “This data is telling us it’s a toss up.”
Unicorns obviously have very healthy gut bacteria.
Hospitals with their life, death, and strange-smell zeitgeist have been the setting for several major revelations in my life (not the least of which is that nutritionists consider Malt-o-Meal a “solid food” but Jell-O is a “liquid”) and this time it was no different. My 3rd son, just nine months old at the time, hung limply in my arms as nurses and doctors buzzed around us. There was no waiting for us in the the waiting room when I brought my baby in, nearly unconscious with a fever of 107. The triage nurse took one look at my son and half the night staff descended on us. Weirdly all I could think about was the beginning of that Nicholas Cage/Meg Ryan flick City of Angels where the least sexy angel ever, Seth (Cage), escorts a little girl in yellow footie pajamas to heaven after she dies of a fever. The opening sequence ends with the anguished wail of her mother. To this day I hate that movie. (Although Meg Ryan was adorable. I miss that Meg Ryan.)
Cannot even tell you how many times I’ve either given a baggie like this or gotten one. And it makes me giggle. Every. Time. (My fave was when Deb the Smoothie Girl sent me a whole package of baggies of different white powders! I can only imagine what FedEx thought. But I still love xantham gum to this day so thank you, Deb!)
“Nope, never tried it. But I bet Charlotte has!” Turbo Jennie waved at me over her shoulder, still talking to the girl in the tank top about some supplement or another.
“Tried what?” I asked, before realizing that her answer didn’t really matter. It didn’t matter because the sad truth – and in truth I really am sad about this – is that I probably have tried it. Illegal drugs hold no interest for me. Legal drugs terrify me. But call it a vitamin or slap a “proven by research” label on it and I’m a serious sucker.
Accosted at Costco. That’s either the best name of a new novel or the worst way to spend a Saturday. I think you can guess which direction this is going. After a sweaty Turbokick class I was feeling blitzed so I suggested to my husband that we take the kids to Costco for what I call “the walking lunch.” (Confession: I actually wanted to go to Costco because my friend told me they had tutus on sale there and you know I have a tutu addiction. So what if they only come in sizes 3T-7? Elastic is stretchy, right??) See, on Saturdays Costco deploys their fleet of taste testers – generally sweet elderly people who give my kids two of everything – and by the time we’ve walked up and down all the aisles the kids have had lunch and I’ve got my shopping done. I know, I’m a parenting genius. (Or lazy.)