Today as I scrolled down through my newsfeed, I saw it: “Top 10 Mistakes You’re Making in the Gym” (the histrionic RIGHT NOW!!! was implied). I felt my eyes glaze over – another day, another “what not to do at the gym” list. I dunno, guys. Maybe I’m jaded but I’ve read a million of these (heck, I think I even wrote one myself) and I just can’t get worked up anymore about people dropping the weights, taking too long on the hip abductor machine, singing out loud or hitting on anything with boobs. I tried, really I did, especially with the last one, but I was overwhelmed… with ennui. (And my lack of boobs.)
Forget night swimming REM, night running has always been my favorite nocturnal sport. There’s just something about running through an unlit night, the inky blackness completely obliterating my body until I feel incorporeal. Dispossessed. Airborne. In the sense of flying, yes, but also that I feel born of air. I’m elegant in ways that I never can be in daylight. I’m light and quick through the dark, a sure-footed sprite.
That is until I trip over a tree root and face plant.
Oh and did I mention that I like to do my night running set to Orff’s “Carmina Burana” or Edvard Grieg’s Peer Gynt Suite? (Lie: It’s “In the Hall of the Mountain King”. Of course it is.) Very very loudly. And with no reflective gear, save the glow of my pale legs? And preferably in the mountains or the forest? It’s the closest I get to real magic.
It’s probably also the closest I get to really putting myself in danger too which is why I’ve not done it in years. And that’s a travesty because I used to love it.
Have you seen these?! Adidas unveiled their new “springblade” running shoes this week and I’m kind of dying to try* them. From my highly (non)scientific analysis, they seem to be based on the same principle behind the carbon fiber “blade” prosthetics used by Oscar Pistorious in the Olympics. And I remember a big hullabaloo at the time about how they made him “inhumanly” fast which is why I totally want to try these shoes. Even though Oscar Pistorious is a total d-bag and these are made out of plastic and… oh don’t rain on my parade. They’re kinda pretty in a weird, funky way, no? Sort of like a cross between track spikes, those Kangaroo bouncy shoes and those little plastic doohickeys we used in the 80’s to make hook rugs. LOVE. (Both the shoes and the rugs. I was seriously into hooking – of the rug variety – as a kid.)