Where Do You Draw The Line Between Having Drive and Being Driven? [Jillian Michaels’ Fiasco Answers All the Wrong Questions]

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So, did you hear there was A Thing on The Biggest Loser last week? No, not “the Thing” (although there’s a show I would watch!) but A Thing That Happened. In fact, this Thing Happened so hard that I got a PR blast from Jillian Michael’s team containing her response to the Thing. Know what makes for a fun party game? Reading the PR attempt at spin control before you even know what happened! I did not know the Thing. I did not know any of the Things. Confession time: I’ve watched exactly one episode of The Biggest Loser. It gave me such a deep sad, I just couldn’t get into it.

Part of that is my lifelong admitted obsession with weight and dieting; watching other people diet and lose weight is a massive eating disorder trigger for me. It’s my issue and I’ll own it. The fact that I have too much emotional weight baggage to deal with other people’s emotional weight baggage isn’t the show’s fault. And I can definitely see from all the press it’s gotten why people find The Biggest Loser so compelling. However. A big part of why I don’t watch is because I don’t think they show healthy or realistic solutions and it’s turned into a modern-day circus sideshow – ladies and gents, the incredible shrinking wo/man! Pay no attention to the smoke and mirrors and glistening piles of sugar-free Jell-O! (Don’t believe me? Check outthis story with the beautiful, strong and very honest Kai Hibbard of Season 3.)

So you’ll understand why when I got an email from Jillian Michaels’ PR rep about the recent “energy supplement” fiasco on The Biggest Loser, I almost just deleted it. For anyone else who may have missed the show – and the subsequent tempest in an herbal-infused teapot – I guess Jillian gave her team some of her newest energy drink which contains some caffeine and other “metabolic boosters.” (eBoost? Which sounds to me like a geriatric meal replacement drink delivered electronically? Poor oldsters.) The other teams didn’t get any and people thought that wasn’t fair so her team got benched and some other guy got brought back and people cried and Jillian yelled and maybe it’s all just a big media stunt to make a million bloggers type “eBoost” unironically…that’s all I could glean from the PR rep’s apologist e-mail because I’m too lazy to go find an actual clip and watch it.

But I’m confused. How is this even A Thing?

I mean Jillian’s hawked caffeine pills, fat burners, cleanses, supplements and variety of other dubious weight-loss tools for years. (Along with her awesome workouts – heaven help me, I love me a good JM shred.) Heck, she even openly admits to using “shortcuts” herself. I remember the first time I read her book Making the Cut (yeah, I’ve read it… several times), I kind of fell in love with her during the last chapter where she talks about everything she did to get ready for the photoshoot for the picture on the cover of the book. 600 calories per day, diuretics, 2-a-day workouts, sauna sweats and her own concoction of caffeine, white willow bark and bitter orange. So a little caffeinated workout bevie? Eh.

And in case you’re curious about Jillian’s official response: After listing all the benefits of caffeine the PR rep quotes Jillian as saying, “so it’s something that I’m going to be exploiting. I’m always looking for that angle.”

See? She’s nothing if not honest! Girl is in it to win it. And I’m glad she’s honest. In this day where so many beautiful people hide all the work it takes to be beautiful, I wish more people were that honest. But the more I thought about it, the more I wished it wasn’t something she needs to be honest about. I can’t decide if this is why I hate the Biggest Loser (exploiting! angles!) or if this is just indicative of how we’ve all become accustomed to thinking about weight loss.

This was brought home for me as I read people’s comments about it on Facebook. I had quite a few friends defending Jillian with the defense, “BUT CAFFEINE WORKS! RESEARCH SAYS SO!” (Slight tangent: I don’t think anyone was accusing Jillian of giving out shoddy supps. I think the problem was that not all the teams got it so her team had an unfair advantage. Or something. Like I said, didn’t watch it.) But the real issue for me is why we have these “metabolic boosting” supplements at all. 

For the record, my caffeine-lovin’ friends are right. Kinda. Caffeine does have proven metabolic boosting effects and if you’re not desensitized to it, it can up your workout output by up to 30% – a substantial difference if you’re an elite athlete. It helps you go harder for longer with less perception of pain. Five years ago, I would have been all over this. Actually I was all over it. I’ve tried nearly every supplement out there. And here’s what it’s boiled down to for me:

Because why?

I guess I see why Jillian would want to use it. They’re in a competition and she wants to win! Same goes for elite athletes where seconds mean the difference between gold and a lifetime of lucrative endorsements or as a poorly annotated Wiki footnote (that’s Dante’s lesser-known 6 1/2th circle of Hell). But for the rest of us? Does shaving 7 minutes off our 10K time – taking us from placing 266th to 234th in our community fun run – worth the very real risks that come with these supplements?

Because there are always, always risks. Even with the most innocuous drugs. First, that shiz ain’t cheap. Companies have a million different (convincing) ways to get you to keep buying. And because they’re unregulated you have no guarantee as to what’s actually in them (for example, two companies recently got busted for having “meth-like” compounds in their pre-workout supplements). Even if they’re exactly what you think they are, there’s the risk of abusing them or accidentally taking too many different types of stimulants together. There are the big risks like heart arrhythmias, strokes and death. There are the little risks like screwing up your thyroid from constantly overstimulating your system, suppressing your immune system from chronically pushing your body beyond what it’s meant to do, stress fractures from masking pain signals. Plus, did you know excess caffeine shortens the telomeres on your DNA, effectively making you age faster? The research says all that too.

But what if you, say, win your age division? What if you qualify for Boston? What if you get to ride in the peloton at Nationals? Is it worth it then? Is losing 10 pounds, only to regain them once you stop taking the pills, worth it? Is being able to up your max bench worth it? Is being able to run six miles a day, 365 days a year worth it? Is climbing Everest worth it?Are bragging rights worth it?

The thing is, the pills/drinks/supplements (the good ones anyhow) do give you an edge. BUT WHY DO WE NEED AN EDGE?

I’ve been pondering that one all weekend. It’s a weird paradigm shift for me. For years, I did everything I could to maximize every measure of performance. Every ounce of fat lost, every race ran, every mirror-show-down in the weight room, was another jewel in my victory trophy. But what did I win, really? No, seriously, I’m asking you. What did I win, in the end?

I do think that doing something just for the personal satisfaction of doing it and knowing you did your best, is cool. There’s almost nothing more glorious feeling than crossing a finish line (or hefting a weight or winning the jump rope war) and knowing how hard you worked to get there!  And sitting on your butt, never taking any risks is as bad for your soul as it is your waistline. There’s something to be said for doing something purely for the sense of accomplishment it gives you. What’s the old adage? Why did you climb Everest? Because it’s there! Plus, not gonna lie, winning stuff is fun! And don’t we sometimes have to push ourselves to a place of discomfort to get what we want?

But on the other hand, if your accomplishments become one long list of never-good-enoughs then it’s a waste of energy and resources. No matter how good you get, someone will always be better. Life’s too short to always feel like you’re coming in second and dreaming of first. I’ve been caught up in the trap of using my accomplishments (both athletic and otherwise) to bolster up my low self-esteem. It’s been so so hard for me to learn that we are not defined by our accomplishments – I am worthy of love and respect simply for being, not for doing. So are you. And it’s still a struggle. We live in a society that rewards achievement. But what are we achieving with this constant push to be more?

What are the supplements teaching us? That we need them? That without them, we’d never be enough on our own? That everyone else is using them so if we don’t we risk getting left behind? That faster, bigger, longer, stronger is always better than slower, smaller, shorter, softer? (Have we forgotten that maybe we don’t actually want a faster metabolism?) That a sense of achievement can be bought??

I’m just saying that if even the “best trainer” in the country needs supps to get her job done then maybe it’s not the supplements or even the trainer that’s the problem – maybe it’s our collective goals.

So now I’m asking you: Where do you draw the line between “having drive” and “being driven” ? What’s your policy for using “metabolic boosters”? What do you think of The Biggest Loser/Jillian Michael THING? Anyone else think “eBoost” is a really unfortunate name??

21 Comments

  1. I don’t take anything extra. I think there’s a fine line between being driven and being cray cray crazy and it’s too easy to cross when you start with supplements and whatnot.

    I exercise etc to be healthy – a healthy weight, a healthy body fat % and a healthy life. That’s it. I’m not trying to win a competition or anything like that, so who am I competing with?

  2. If coffee counts as a metabolic booster (since there is a TON of caffeine in it!), then I am guilty of a metabolic booster every day! I love coffee, it’s so yummy, and I look forward to it in the morning. It makes getting out of bed in the wee hours of the morning and running a little easier. I also have whey protein powder from time to time when I need protein and I can’t stomach another piece of grilled chicken…

    Onto Jillian!

    I don’t think there is anything wrong with what Jillian did. In the grand scheme of how unhealthy the show The Biggest Loser is, I don’t think the contestants taking a caffeine supplement is that big of a deal. Like Jillian said, there’s more caffeine in a cup of coffee than what she gave her contestants. I guess I would wonder why she just didn’t follow the rules and ask permission from the producers before she did it? She is a little bit of a renegade, which is why I like her. But if she didn’t follow the rules of asking, I guess she can’t be mad if the producers are ticked!

  3. I call publicity stunt. I didn’t even know that show was still on the air (never watched it) but now I do, because this “scandal” is all over the internet.

  4. “Life’s too short to always feel like you’re coming in second and dreaming of first. ”
    Exactly.
    For me if I can’t do something on my own, then I’m not willing to supplement myself. It’s too easy to get caught up in the “never enough” attitude instead of just striving for your best and accepting what your body can offer you. Having serious health issues has put this in perspective for me…
    Suffice it to say, I’ve never like the Biggest Loser.

  5. I do watch The Biggest Loser because I love to critique it. It’s not exactly “hate watching” but very close. So I was right there when The Thing happened. And I had pretty much the same reaction as you. So what.

    But then I looked at it a little closer and I see what this really was. Jillian Michaels was using her contestants to “test” (if you will) her new supplement. If she ends up having a winning contestant, she can then use it as part of her advertising campaign. And I’m sure the powers that be (on The Biggest Loser) weren’t happy about THAT. I’ve seen JM reference TBL in commercials for other products she hocks (her dvds and the treadmill thing she’s associated with–not her supplements) and they have to have a disclaimer that TBL does not endorse the item, so I’m guessing this is more a legal issue than a fair play one.

    Heck, I’ve watched TBL for many seasons now and it’s pretty well known there are a TON of shenanigans on that show ranging from minor (they say it’s a “week” between weigh ins but that could be anywhere from 7 – 14+ days in real time) to more dramatic (JM had another “doping” scandal a few seasons back, when one of her own contestants exposed that she was using supplements with her contestants–so pretty much the same Thing as this time around). And there is always the water loading issue. OH, the water loading! So when this latest “shocker” came out it was all so much of the same.

    I’m with you. I enjoy a good JM workout (and Bob Harper’s dvd set–really like it) but I don’t buy anything with the official TBL name on it (including their TBL branded fresh veggies–that just hurts my brain and soul). I also steer clear of pretty much any item TBL hocks on the show (Jennie O turkey, Subway, gum, etc).

    It’s ok to watch a show like TBL but you have to be careful. It’s very easy to become a little brainwashed, just like the contestants on the show (the stockholm syndrome on those folks is frightening!).

    I really wish there were MORE tell alls from former contestants. But I’m sure they sign away their first born and soul to keep them from discussing what really goes on behind The Ranch doors.

  6. 1- I don’t watch the show either. I *have* in the past, but I don’t see a reason anymore for me to watch it, dreaming about the day I will lose the weight I want to lose while I’m sitting on my bottom watching a tv show! (Seriously?!)
    2- I don’t use “supplements” beyond a vitamin (at my docs recommendation), again, I *have* tried them, but I have found that I am overly sensitive to their effects and that’s something I don’t want to get used to.
    3- I am to a point where I think we, as a society, are focusing on ALL the wrong things. I don’t care what happened on the latest episode of whatever-is-hot-right-now because it doesn’t effect my life, it effects my perception of my life and I just don’t need that mess.
    Charlotte, I love reading your blog (and your FB posts! You crack me up!) And I am glad you’re one of those that looks at these things without the rose colored glasses. You keep it real and for that, I thank you! 🙂

  7. Good article! We never hear the negatives of caffeine in the press. No thank you to accelerated aging!

  8. I also hate TBL. I hate the unhealthy, unrealistic practices, the yelling, the competition based on the scale. In one episode a few years back, a contestant apparently lost 30 pounds in one week. It was probably, as JLVerde, says, more like 2 weeks, but still! 30 pounds in 2 weeks, and no one raised a red flag?!?!?!
    It has also raised completely unrealistic expectations. When I was working at the gym, SO MANY of my clients despaired at how slowly they were losing weight. We all tried to remind our clients that 7 pounds a week is NOT normal nor healthy, and that, in the long run, slower weight loss usually meant more sustained weight loss. But all our clients watched TBL and didn’t want to hear it.
    Finally, I just don’t think trainers should be giving out supplements. If they want to recommend some, fine, but clients should check with their doctors first. There were a rash of fatal heart attacks back in the 90’s from unregulated supplements sold at gyms. And all these supplements are STILL unregulated.
    Just my 2 cents.

  9. This is definitely a crazy article! I think that there’s obvious ways this could have been handled in a slightly more professional fashion–but welcome to ‘murricah! (America, with the infamous redneck accent).
    No matter what motivates you, just make sure that you’re being healthy and making, overall, healthy lifestyle decisions.

  10. I’ve never seen the show, but we haven’t had TV besides Netflix for about 4 years. I think everything done for ‘reality’ shows is aaaallllll for publicity and ratings. I hate my emotions being manipulated which is why I don’t watch ‘reality’ television. This was made into a Thing by the producers to boost ratings.I can almost guarantee it. If the producers were so bent outta shape by it they wouldn’t have included it in the final cut.
    I also don’t use supplements cause crap is exPENsive! Also, though I am crazy competitive, knowing someone will ALWAYS be better than me reigns in my crazy a little. I’ve always been a B+, A- at my very best, so life has taught me it’s not worth knocking myself out to achieve second best when I can easily and happily get third.

  11. I think our bodies are smarter than we give them credit for and they don’t take kindly to being tricked. I have had to ‘strongly discourage’ comments about taking something to give me energy because when I have, it was awesome! I could do everything I felt needed to get done. Then the next day hit and my body cursed me for using what I didn’t naturally have. It might provide us with a nice accomplished feeling in the midst of what we are doing, but payback will always come. What are we willing to pay back? Years, health, happiness?

  12. I made the mistake of following the link to your previous article before actually finishing reading this one first and forgot that it wasn’t the post of the day and got worked up and commented over there. And then came back here to see if the comment posted properly and got all confuzzled. Are there any supplements that specifically make a person think more clearly on Monday mornings?? haha

    I have never watched The Biggest Loser, but have had enough peripheral exposure to develop a distaste for Jillian Michaels. After reading here that she essentially starved herself for the photoshoot of her book cover my feelings of distaste of vastly heightened; does she address how much of a contradiction it is to be in the business of selling health advice/products while engaging in such unhealthy behaviours? I am obviously taking it out of context and ignorant of the specifics of her whole situation, but it strikes me as bizarre in the extreme and a poignant indication of how crazy and messed up the world of weight loss and fitness really is. I’m not saying she should be outlawed or that she hasn’t helped a lot of people, I’m just saying that it in my mind it is all very strange.

    Re: supplements, I have never taken any myself aside from a multivitamin (when I can remember it), and I have never had a liking for an industry built on profiting from people’s insecurities and body issues. I am not saying supplements are worthless, rather that it can be likened to the cosmetics industry; some products probably do (at least part) of what they’re meant to do, but the market is glutted with a vast majority of products that probably do next to nothing. However. since there will always be an overabundance of people with disposable incomes and the need to find a fix for their body issues, as long as the products don’t actually cause a person harm (and even if they do, in some cases!) there will always be a market for them.

    I am not necessarily against supplements in general, but I have a healthy dose of skepticism as to whether they’re as essential as so many make them out to be. I think in large they can be useful as an aid for fitness but are not essential (eg like having a gym membership), and that if a person can afford them they can possible use them to tweak their fitness/health to an even higher degree. After a lot of reading I recently decided I’d likely benefit from taking a fish-oil supplement, but when I went to buy some I had to put them back because I’m on a very limited budget and simply can’t afford them while just trying to eat a diet of produce and lean meats is seriously straining my extremely tight budget. I am disappointed, but I am telling myself that possible benefit of the supplement is hopefully small compared to the more essential benefit of having a healthy diet.

    I also avoid drinking any forms of caffeine, and as it happens I developed an interest in the LDS Church after learning on your blog that part of your faith involves avoiding it too 🙂

  13. I run the YW volleyball program at church and it’s incredible how competitive people can get sometimes (never the girls, usually the coaches/parents). Sometimes I have to remind them, do you know what the winner gets? Nothing. Absolutely nothing.

    It’s easier to tell that to someone else than to myself. I’m not a supplement gal, but I do push my workouts hard and am disappointed with bad race performances. I need to remind myself more that I will never be fast enough that shaving a few seconds here or there will make an actual difference.

    We are always looking for an edge, even better if we can get an edge without really working hard for it, but they come at a price and we need to be aware of that.

  14. “No matter how good you get, someone will always be better. Life’s too short to always feel like you’re coming in second and dreaming of first.” YES! The goal needs to be to be one’s best self. I do well as a triathlete and marathoner and you know what my edge is? Consistent training, a positive attitude, commitment to work hard, and gratitude for the ability to do so. The real EDGE can’t be bought and no one can take my EDGE from me. Yes, I take vitamins and minerals, I have race wheels…yada yada….but in my mind I know beyond a shadow of a doubt my edge is mind, spirit, body.

    Coaches and trainers should be very careful with recommending things that give an “edge” because then people think it’s the edge and not them that is successful and they become reliant.

  15. Hmmmm this seems like a theme this week for me. I did my longest run to date (admittedly by an unfortunate inability of me and my boyfriend to do math…) but going into it knowing it would be a longer run. I realized going into it I was only going into it to finish (a “long run” is about a one third longer than our usual evening runs) and boy did it feel good to finish. I get a bit competitive about my regular, shorter run times, but I’m really proud that I am ok running a minute and a half slower on a longer run than on a shorter run. I suppose I am finding my drive instead of letting myself be driven by my new running passion. Thanks for pointing out the difference-I think it is an important thing to recognize, acknowledge, and check yo self on!

  16. Well dang, I guess I’m just gonna have to age faster because I LOVE my coffee and ain’t giving it up.

    I’m like you in being oblivious about the Biggest Loser goings on–sometimes my better half watches and the product placement and whipped-up drama etc usually cause me to flee the room. But I do like Jillian in spite of, or heck, partly because of, her faults. She can be hilariously honest about her shortcomings, it’s pretty endearing.

  17. I love coffee. I love the boost I get from caffeine (I figure it’s the closest I’m going to get to methamphetamine level productivity!). That said, I’ve over-done it before and it lost efficacy so I now limit coffee to 1-2x/week.
    As for workout supplements, I’m not interested. If I’m dragging, I’d consider coffee, but an energy beverage? No thanks. I’m all for fine-tuning my diet to feel my best and improve my workouts but that’s about as far as I’m going to go. As I’ve gotten older, I’ve realized most “short-cuts” come at a cost and without the folly of youth blurring my vision, I know it’s not worth it!
    Finally, I love a Jillian Michael’s workout but I couldn’t care less about TBL or the drama therein.

  18. I’ve never been a fan of the show, I think the ‘boot camp’ approach to weight loss and fitness really doesn’t help most people in the medium to long term.

    The whole incident is a PR stunt, no doubt about it.

    IMO suppliments should be used in the way their name suggests – to supplement your existing diet and give you that little bit extra when you need it. Struggling for energy before a workout? Have some caffine. Short on protein for today? Have a shake!

  19. I didn’t think much of the pressure people face when competing until I started racing in college. Even though I wasn’t racing for money or even at the top level, I felt a massive amount of pressure to win once I had a couple of victories under my belt.

    It really put the whole issue into perspective when it came to finding an edge. Be it an edge over rivals or even a PR stunt in business, once you know you can win you feel like you have to and the lines between right and wrong get really fuzzy really fast.

  20. Thank you so much for pointing this out! I do watch the Biggest Loser, but I don’t read about it on the internet and certainly never knew any of this! I saw the caffeine supplement debacle episode, and it really disillusioned me to the whole process. I have, however, noticed that every time that show is on I get back on the ‘dieting wagon’ and get extra critical of my body. In my own disordered eating state, I just interpret that as the show encouraging me to do/be better. I think I am like you, and so many others, when I tell myself that if I am perfect THEN people will love me. My darling fiance has finally learned enough about me to identify when this is happening so he can remind me that I am loved. Period. Thanks for being such a strong role model that I can keep moving in healthier directions! Your blog really makes such a difference in my day!

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