Progesterone Cream Mega-Fail: The things I’ll try to cure my PMS [Help me?]

Now that’s a problematic bikini line!

Repeat after me: I will not take medical advice from celebrities whose claim to fame is a Playboy spread. I’m not saying Jenny McCarthy isn’t funny, talented and gorgeous but the only medical tips I’m taking from her here on out are those regarding my bikini line. (Side note: as a child, I always thought “bikini line” meant hair on your belly, along the waistband of the bikini. It horrified me that puberty was apparently going to give me a furry tummy. When it didn’t I felt all superior to those poor women who had to wax their bellybutton every week just to wear short shorts. It took years and a very blunt woman with a graphic postcard in Spain before I learned the truth.)

One of the main takeaways I got from reading Jenny McCarthy’s book Love, Lust & Faking It (aff) – besides the fact that she and Chelsea Handler talk on the phone every night; don’t you wish you were a fly on that wall?! – was her total love for natural progesterone cream. She admits early and often that she’s a little wacky when it comes to health, believing in auras, crystals, and other “out there” sundries but over the years I’ve become a lot more open to alternative remedies and so I figured it was worth a shot.
My main complaint since I first hit puberty (at 16, give it up for the late bloomers!) has been wicked PMS. I spend two weeks of the month alienating everyone I love and eating everything in site and the next two weeks apologizing and eschewing sugar. I’ve tried everything short of a hysterectomy, so what’s a little cream? For the record: I did talk to my OBGYN first. I know, me consulting a medical professional before going off half-cocked; that’s got to be some kind of GFE record. And she told me to go ahead and do it. I didn’t hear any maniacal laughter but perhaps she waited until she hung up the phone.
Back on my PMS post, I got a lot of great suggestions from you guys. Everything from special diets (taking out sugar, carbs and caffeine were popular options) to supplements (calcium, magnesium, black cohosh and vitamin D all made appearances) to taking my doctor’s original advice which was a scrip for Yaz, a hormonal birth control pill. I wrote in my post that I was tired of messing around with my hormones and wanted to try something more natural. So which option did I choose to try first? Hormone cream of course!
Several of you recommended I read What Your Doctor May Not Tell You About Premenopause: Balance Your Hormones and Your Life From Thirty to Fifty (aff) by Dr. Lee so I snapped that up from Amazon along with a bottle of the progesterone cream he recommends. Let me interrupt this GFE Fail to tell you that I loved this book. It has a ton of great info in it and is very well researched. The main premise is that lots of women have low progesterone levels. It’s just that I think I can safely say now that I am not one of those women.
I started the cream on day 12 of my cycle using the lowest dosage recommended. Within three days I was starving, bloated, my boobs hurt, I was wicked constipated, heartburn was waking me up at night and I was having awful menstrual cramps. In the smack dab middle of my cycle. It only took me a couple of days of feeling like this to realize that this is exactly why I hate being pregnant.
Yes, progesterone cream made me feel all the worst parts of a pregnancy without any of the fun stuff like freaking strangers out with my alien morphing stomach. I thought I was going crazy – or heaven help me, really was pregnant (I’M NOT) – until I read this great article about “The Impact of the Hormone Cycle on Energy Determinants.” It’s a bit dense but it is definitely worth reading. (Your cravings and crazy hunger right before your period are not all in your head after all!)
You know how some supplements you take but you never really know if they’re doing anything?Progesterone cream is not one of those. Boy howdy can you feel it. It definitely wasn’t a placebo! I stopped taking it after four days, yet four days was all it took to wreak total havoc on my cycle. I’m not the most regular girl to begin with but starting my period on day 22 is crazy even for me.
The one small upside is that my period’s been super light. Although maybe this isn’t really a period and I’m just spotting? If I get a monster period on day 31, screw it, I’m buying a tent. Do you think Columbia makes one in red? I’m hoping that it will have worked its way out of my system by my next cycle and I can go back to being my usual raging weepy chocoholic self because that actually seems like a pretty good deal at the moment.
While progesterone cream has worked miracles for Jenny McCarthy and quite a few of you guys, it made me feel awful. So what’s next in the PMS battle? So far the only thing that’s made any noticeable difference for me are magnesium supplements (I take 400mg and they act like a muscle relaxant). Although my sister gave me some very sensible advice when she said, “Maybe your PMS is so bad because your body is telling you you need a break. You never stop! Perhaps if you just listened to yourself and took it easy for a week every month your uterus wouldn’t have to slap you silly.” Rest? I’m considering it.
Have any of you tried progesterone cream? Any PMS remedies that have really helped you? Anyone else confused about what a “bikini line” was??

42 Comments

  1. Yikes! That sounds like an awful experience.

    To be honest, I’ve not found anything that works wonders on period pain. The best I can do is try to distract myself by exercising, reading, or making out. Good luck!

    • Ginger! It’s not a miracle cure but it definitely helps, and when I combine it with Midol or any other pain meds, I’ve seen a difference. I drink a lot of ginger ale (trader joe’s here has some with more ginger and less soda) but anything with ginger in it helps.

  2. Have you been evaluated for PMDD? I was treated for it with Prozac for 3 years, but now just take my supplements and eat better during PMS time (lower carb, no after dinner eating, etc…) and I can usually keep it under control. PMDD book by Huston is whet I read for alternates to Prozac.

  3. I really have no idea whether it was the switch or if it’s just because I got older (I’m in my early 30s), but after I switched to the Diva Cup my cramping and other issues got a lot better. I can’t really think of why it would affect things, but it seems to have worked.

  4. I have bad PMS and someone recommended me to not only take Magnesium but also Vitamin C. I have and it does seems to help for a while.
    I remember my mother telling me when I first got my period (very early and with bad cramps) that in some cultures women would be able to spend the days of their period in a special place and didn’t have to do their usual chores. They weren’t shunned but rather were given the time they needed to rest. I think of this often and wish we could have a place like that.

  5. When you say PMS, you mean the emotional swings before it starts and not cramps at the beginning, right? (Some people use it to mean anything period related…)
    Hormonal BC makes me feel insane all the time so I don’t take it, but I once asked my yoga teacher about this. She said cutting down on starches, sugar and caffeine can help (and pointed out that anything like Midol has a lot of caffeine, so you can cut down on your coffee and still be at regular caffeine levels) but do Mormons avoid caffeine like alcohol? I’m not sure. (If you normally do but then take meds with caffeine in them, that probably isn’t helping.)
    She also said, like your sister, that if you think about it, your body is actually working really hard and doing some tiring stuff, so to give yourself a break. Her advice was to try to go to bed a little early and sleep a little late if you can, but also to just take care of yourself and give your self a break-have wine and cookie dough for dinner if that makes you feel better, or take a bubble bath. But cut yourself a break.
    It’s not a cure-all, but I do think it helps a bit. And for me, stopping to give myself a break also reminds me I might be a little shorter with other people because of that, so to stop and breathe before I get mad/sad/etc. I get the war everything in sight thing too, by the way, so I try to eat some comfort food and then lots of healthy stuff, with lots of protein. Don’t know if that helps or is just in my mind…

  6. I don’t really have any great advice. Generally just warning the fiance that I’m going to be a bit nuts for a couple days, relaxing a little about eating so healthy, and having 1 good cry (even if it’s over a dog food commercial) does it for me. But I’ve never had bad PMS. Fingers crossed I never do. I hope you find some relief.

    I just wanted to say mainly: as someone who’s definitely closer to 30 than 20, I refuse to believe 30 is premenopause! Like seriously? I haven’t even had kids yet and I have to think about this? Ugh!

    • YES!! THIS. I was thinking the same thing being 1 month away from 31….no kids either…I’m already pre-menopausal??

    • Tamara and Abby – nononono… I don’t think you need to be worrying much yet. If you read the book it explains it better but basically once you’re past your peak fertility (around age 28) then your hormones are slowly shifting towards menopause. It’s a gradual thing though.

  7. If you spend half your cycle PMSing, that sounds really serious. I thought it was supposed to be a couple of days?

    Granted, I don’t get PMS, but on the other hand, I used to get serious heavy periods until I got on birth control. Sorry Yaz didn’t work out for you; it worked wonders for me. Apparently the Super Secret Gynecologist Tip is that you don’t ever actually have to have periods; you can just take birth control forever and nothing goes wrong…so now I haven’t had a period in about six months. It’s so good. So amazingly good. I still get spotting sometimes, but I can wear a very small pad and it’s fine, rather than dealing with the monster overnight-flow pads that I had to wear as *normal pads* much of the time. I also sometimes got really sucky cramps; now I basically never do, or the bloating/etc. that comes with cycles.

    If that didn’t do it for you, maybe a higher dosage of The Pill would work? Although you might be like me, where your doctor person is like “well, you’re on such a high dosage already, really, we can’t do any more than this.”

    So….sorry, not a good solution, but I hope you find something. 🙁

  8. I’ve heard that Evening Primrose Oil can help, but then again, it was one of those miracle cures years ago that was supposed to help with everything. My Dad took it for his Psoriasis and it did help him, but he had to take a lot of it. Probably wouldn’t cause any adverse effects to try it though. I’m really bad at remembering to take supplements, so unfortunately I can’t relate any personal experience with it as I never managed to stick with it long enough.

    My PMS is really unpredictable. Sometimes I get really anxious and weepy. Sometimes I want to eat everything. Sometimes I just get really tired. I never know what I’m going to get. It’s a Roulette wheel, I tell you. 😉

  9. I find that regular exercise and sleep help for me, but since I am on birth control and have been forever…my PMS is lessened, and craziness is random. Anywhere from minimal to crazy eat my arm of cramptown depending on the month and how tired/stressed out I am at the time. I try and take it easy when things are bad, not make any important decisions and settle down with a big bowl of rice cakes and relax. 🙂

  10. Reminds me of the time my doctor put me on iron pills. That was one hellish month! Every side effect that could happen did. I was a blotchy itchy sick 12 year old.

  11. I asked my doctor how to not have it be so painful and she just suggested taking painkillers on the days around when I was going to bleed so I never felt it come on. Not quite what I was looking for (I wanted to prevent the pain, not cover it up). Exercise has not helped, eating healthy has not helped, I just truly have that one day per month where I am useless if I don’t react quickly and decisively with painkillers and/or herbal muscle relaxers (my one tip – look into valerian root and 303 muscle relaxers – totally natural and totally help).

    Fun fact: my first marathon last November was on that day. Sigh.

  12. I find my PMS symptoms getting worse And lasting longer as I get older (joy). I find myself getting terribly depressed. My doc has also recommended vitamin D, so we’ll see how it goes.
    I LOVE the idea of only getting 2 periods a year, but, unfortunately, cannot take hormones.
    Sorry I don’t have better advice. But if you buy that tent, can I come over & sit in it with you?

  13. A hysterectomy works wonders. 🙂

    Sorry, I never found a good solution; was on birth control for ages and that wasn’t enough, though it might have been worse with out it.

    I did read, I think on your blog, that the pill can affect muscle building ability in women, and discovered that once I went off it I could finally do pull ups! Which of course has no relevance to PMS but I’m on my third cup of coffee.

  14. I was on Yaz once and it turned me into an emotional zombie. I literally had no emotions, lost my libido, had no interest in men or women and if something effected me, like a death in the family or something, I went suicidal. It was bad. Found out that my family has a history of having hormonal inbalances to begin with and it just made it worse. I went off and everything went back to normal.

    I get one day of PMS now, right down to vomiting. I took some pain killers, went to work until I couldn’t handle the pain anymore and retired home with a warm rice bag on my stomach. Nothing helps, even this just makes me feel a little better. And the running to the bathroom every 20 minutes doesn’t help any either.

  15. I started natural progesterone cream and I went with natural protection (diva cup and organic cotton pads). I’ve always had nasty PMS. The first month on the cream was rough and my first period was one of my worst. But I kept at it and the last couple of periods have been almost blissful. It’s amazing. I don’t know if you are low on progesterone, but, if you can push through for a couple of months you might see a difference.
    I have PCOS and endometriosis along with my PMS, so I was virtually certain that I was low.
    Good luck finding what works for you.
    -K

  16. I recently found out about Dr. Peter Eckhart and his in depth research on progesterone and hormonal issues. He has a lot of free information on his site including many videos to watch, and if you order his Progestelle, he sends a list of estrogenic products to avoid, as well as other tips. He also has a medical form on his site that you can fill out and send to him and he will prepare a personal response for your issues. I’m not sure if you have to order his Progestelle or not to do that – I ordered it and I sent in the form and within a day he responded – but it’s not expensive stuff.

    After everything else I have looked into regarding progesterone replacement and hormones, I would recommend starting with Dr. Eckhart.

  17. Dr. Eckhart’s site is womhoo.com, btw. Oops.

  18. So sorry you have to deal with this, Charlotte. I understand all too well. Three things have helped me *somewhat.*

    1. Cut back on caffeine (this has seemed to help the pain for some reason)
    2. Do some gentle massage and yoga. Stretching out the muscles in your abdomen helps the pain. Here is one that I have used (http://www.videojug.com/film/yoga-postures-for-menstrual-pain-relief). I think yoga has also helped my increased anxiety and sadness during my PMS.
    3. Prozac. No, seriously, Prozac. I’ve tried BC (Seasonale or something similar) and I started going over the edge – abject misery. I’ve been on anti-anxiety meds for years due to OCD and anxiety disorder, but it wasn’t until I got onto Prozac that the week-long mood-swings/depression/PMS lifted. I still can tell that I am extra weepy and down, but at least I no longer feel like hiding under my bed until my period starts.

  19. Cutting back on fried foods and carbs the week before my period — which are EXACTLY the foods I crave the week before my period — helped me a bit.

    But I mostly wanted to say that I read the article title you linked as ““The Impact of the Hormone Cycle on Enemy Combatants” and had several moments of thinking that our torture methods have gotten very weird.

  20. The best way I’ve discovered to ease the pain associated with riding the crimson wave, is to keep my mouth shut and avoid eye-contact with my wife.

  21. HOLY CRAP Charlotte!!!! YIKES! I never really found anything that helped my PMS but I can tell you all the crap going on with perimenopause to menopause & it sucks! 😉

  22. Methyltetrahydrofolate (5MTHF) – worked like magic for me. Even a mild folate deficiency contributes greatly to pms. Are you prone to depression and anxiety as well?

    P.S. thanks for sharing my site…and we still need to connect at the gym!

  23. The only way I can cope with my monthly pains is to try and do some exercise, which helps me sleep. It does help to tell the people around me that it’s that time again.

  24. I have read so many articles on the topic of the blogger lovers but this piece
    of writing is truly a pleasant article, keep it up.

  25. I think this is one of the most vital info for me. And i’m glad reading your article. But wanna remark on few general things, The web site style is great, the articles is really great : D. Good job, cheers

  26. Admiring the dedication you put into your site and
    in depth information you present. It’s good to come across a blog every once in a while that isn’t the same unwanted
    rehashed material. Great read! I’ve saved your site and I’m
    including your RSS feeds to my Google account.

  27. Hi there. Today using bing. That is a genuinely logically prepared document. I most certainly will make sure to take a note of it and return to learn more of your respective helpful tips. Basically submit. I most certainly will certainly come back.

  28. Pingback:Why Does My Tummy Look Four Months Pregnant Every Night? [6 Tips for Beating Stomach Bloating]

  29. Hi there, I’ve just started taking progesterone cream today as being on the progesterone only pill then stopping has made me deficient. I’ve read that symptoms can get worse at first but this soon stops, so hopefully you didn’t give up just then. Would be great to know how things worked out. Good luck!

  30. Wow, that’s what I was looking for, what a data! present here
    at this webpage, thanks admin of this site.

    For a better informative review please check-out this amazing site …
    vitamin b17

  31. I know this if off topic but I’m looking into starting my
    own weblog and was wondering what all is required to get set up?
    I’m assuming having a blog like yours would cost a pretty penny?
    I’m not very web smart so I’m not 100% certain. Any recommendations or advice would be greatly appreciated.
    Thanks

    My page :: body building supplements

  32. I just stared reading a book called, “Dr. Eckhart’s How to Use Progesterone Cream Practical Guide for Avoiding Side Effects & Chemical Estrogens”

    It’s really been helpful. I’m excited to try his recommendations! He explains why progesterone might not be working and how it can make symptoms worse at first. He says you must get rid of certain things in your environment for it to work properly. Here is the book description:

    Progesterone Cream leads to temporary increased worse side effects in forty percent (40%) of patients until the progesterone cream is stopped. Increased bloating, breast tenderness, headaches, breast cysts, endometriosis, menstrual cramping, and ovarian cysts occurs temporarily with 40% of patients taking progesterone cream. Why? Chemical Estrogens (Xenoestrogens) and Plant Estrogens (phytoestrogens) from laundry detergent, shampoo, lotions and deodorant mimic estrogen are creating your condition. Your body tries to become used to these high levels of estrogen mimics (xenoestrogens) and the estrogen receptors become “sleepy.” Then, Progesterone wakes up the “sleepy” receptors and you get those temporary increased BAD SIDE EFFECTS. What is the solution? Cut out the xenoestrogens first for 1-2 months. Then, take progesterone. This short “rubber hits the road” practical downloadable booklet is advice from 12 years and 18,000 patients of clinical practice from a Medical Doctor. Many patients after 3-4 months of avoiding xenoestrogens and taking progesterone don’t even need progesterone after a while. They are just normal not taking anything at all. They no longer need any supplements. Included is a list of common xenoestrogens and recommended products. One of the eye opening facts found was that anything on the skin is 10 times the oral dose in potency because it bypasses the liver. So what you eat does not matter so much as what you put on the skin. Hormone active chemicals and herbs are 90% first pass inactivated by the liver. However, anything you put on the skin is 10 times the oral dose in potency.

  33. I’ve been on progesterone cream for PMS for 20 days, I was hoping it would help with the sore breasts, and sore is truly putting it mildly. I got a high quality cream, and did my homework in regards to using 200 mgs to avoid estrogen dominance. I had to lower that dose when I started cramping to an uncomfortable degree. The only pro I’ve noticed is that I’m not shedding like I was, but to my dismay, last night the sore breasts ached like clock work and the swelling began. I didn’t have any amazing results. My diet is excellent, I’m a weight management consultant. I honestly tried it for the breast pain and I’ve had all of the pms symptoms early. That was bogus. I need to mention that my tubes are tied, my pms has been rapid ever since my 3rd child. He’s right. I was hoping for some relief but I’m bloated, tired and my boobs hurt so I won’t be spending anymore money on it.

  34. i am on hormone replacement therapy, all bio-identical of course. I was having insomnia almost every night and terrible night sweats. I T started at 38 and I had no idea I was in peri-menopause. I had such bad cramps and terrible long thick sludgy periods. The first thing my dr did was give me a “medicinal DNC” done with a 10 day course of a certain kind of progesterone. That is the only time I have ever heard of anybody taking progesterone by itself. Peri-menopause is treated with estrogen. The only reason they add progesterone to the mix is to take away the possibility of developing uterine cancer from the estrogen. After the DNC my periods got way less crampy and are a healthy bright red color from start to finish. I have such relief from the cramps that occasionally I will start my period without any notice. With the other hormones I now sleep through the night and have zero night sweats. Progesterone alone is also used in the morning after pill. I don’t know much about other birth control hormones because every time I tried them I became sick in the way you described. Your dr should have tested your hormone levels before administering any hormones to you.

  35. I am like OP and cannot tolerate progesterone on any way shape or form. I wonder if I don’t have severe PMS to PMDD. I just want to say to women be really careful with hormone creams in particular because the absorption is variable and can take awhile to excrete. I heard women who have intolerance to birth control can take awhile to get back to normal and that would be me!!! Don’t listen to celebrities talk to MD.

  36. Acupuncture and chinese herbal remedies are great for PMS. I use them to control my pms, which is also pretty severe. Srarts right after ovulation if i am not taking care of myself. Plus cutting way back on caffeine (like a tiny cup of white tea in the morning) and cardio exercise help immensely.

  37. Adam Levine commented it was his favorite song of the album.

    Mutter, who appears with pianist Yefim Bronfman and cellist Lynn Harrell at Carnegie Hall next Tuesday as part of her season as a Carnegie Perspectives
    artist, created a foundation in 1997 in part to support her mentoring vision. ‘Did you
    enjoy our performance of #Daylight on #The – Voice.

  38. I sometimes have really bad cramp cycles and really bad PMS cycles and then sometimes NO PMS at all and very little cramping … I am 44 years old … I’ve experienced regular cycles and also irregular cycles. This is what I’ve learned: The cycles in which I’ve exercised … good cardio, like, breathing really hard and a good sweat for about at least 10 minutes a day, and avoided daily sugar (e.g. there’s soooo many sweets at the office … I skip the cookies and chocolate that has with sugar), I had minimal PMS (if any) and minimal cramping. Also, caffeine was only about one 12oz cup of coffee per day (if that), I don’t drink soda and no other caffeinated teas. I mainly drink water or fresh pressed juice. The terrible cycles are when I completely threw out my normal patterns of no grains (gluten) and sugar and ate whatever I wanted, included fried foods, processed foods, anything I wanted, didn’t exercise daily or even every 2 days and had a coffee once or twice a day. I find that drinking a “female support” tea (google it) helps A LOT with PMS and cramps during cycle. Also, if I get PMS prior to cycle now, I do a “Yoni steam” and that helps me TREMENDOUSLY. There’s also a herbal tincture that is sold at Sprouts grocery called “Fertility” that really helps PMS and cramping … it has red clover blossoms, red raspberry leaf, nettles leaf and yellow dock root in it (no alcohol but glycerin and honey) … When I’m feeling very out of it, I make a chocolate drink using raw milk, organic cocoa, carob powder, a little glycerin for sweetness, and 4 dropper fulls of the “Fertility” tincture and talk about MEDICINE !! I just put it all in my Nutribullet and it’s done. There’s no wrong way to do it, ya figure out what tastes right. But the herbal teas are the bomb and so are Yoni steams. I do my own steam … I use fresh herbs, whatever I can find or buy organic, and prepare the herbs in the boiling pot of water, then line a large, wider cleaning bucket with a towel, roll up another towel so I can sit on the edge of the bucket (rest my lower back against the couch) and that’s how I do mine. I started using the Progesterone cream this past luteal phase (I’m preparing for pregnancy) and at first, it relaxed me, but this whole past week I’ve had PMS … but I’ve not been exercising at all. So there you have it.

  39. Evening Primrose Oil capsules plus d-alpha Vitamin E supplements the week before my period really helps calm my otherwise horrible PMS.