Did Plus-Size Paean Crystal Renn Really Betray Us By Losing Weight?

Disclaimer: This post may possibly be triggering for those struggling with eating disorders. They are not discussed in any detail but you know what you need – please take gentle care of yourself.

Crystal Renn in her plus-size heyday

Model Crystal Renn made huge waves (no pun intended) several years ago when she went from a mildly successful straight-size model to a voluptuous, internationally acclaimed plus-size model. Proud of her curves, she even wrote a best-selling book, Hungry: A Young Model’s Story of Appetite, Ambition, and the Ultimate Embrace of Curves, detailing her anorexic past and how she broke free from the body tyranny of our culture. I loved that book so much I read it twice.

Renn as a teenaged anorexic straight-size model

While I was happy for her that she seemed so much happier, what I really loved about it was hopeful it felt – that there was a way to be beautiful at the weight your body was meant to be at. (Also: I loved that her grandmother taught her to swim under water at age 2 by giving her a drinking straw to breathe through and dunking her in the pond. And by “love” I mean am simultaneously in awe and horrified by that story.)

For awhile Renn made the interview rounds and was featured in some high-profile fashion spreads but then she quietly dropped out of sight. When she resurfaced she appeared to be a “normal” size and the Internet went nuts trying to figure out how much weight she’d lost, what her current size was and if she could still be called “plus sized” if she was only a US size 6-8. The furor died down again but now the model has made yet another transformation:

Appearing in the 2012 Sports Illustrated swimsuit issue, one thing was clear: she was back to straight-size modelling. While she says that she lost the weight in a healthy way and is equally as happy with her larger self as she is with her smaller self, many women feel confused and even betrayed.

Of her current exercise regimen, Renn sounds pretty sane and balanced: “I just think that if there is anything you don’t want to do, you shouldn’t do it, so I just tried to live by that. What I do enjoy doing is hiking in nature. I like yoga because it keeps the mind balanced. I like how I feel when I’m doing yoga and it’s also very good to help with modeling—it keeps you flexible and gives you more variety of what you can do on set, so I find that very, very useful. If I’m super stressed and can’t go hiking or do yoga, I’ll go to the gym in my building and do elliptical training.  It’s great because I don’t have a TV so the one time I get to watch TV is in the gym. I’ll have my moment, de-stress, and that’s it.”

But her fans aren’t buying it. “You don’t lose that much weight doing yoga and hiking! You have to put a lot of effort to go from a 14 to a size 6. We’re not that stupid, we know how hard it is to lose weight and she insulted our intelligence.” And from a reaction from PLUS Model magazine, the editor (or the editor quoting a reader), says, “Once she got down to a size 10 she lost the support of a lot of people. We’re disappointed because she was our star fighting for equality and fashion for us, and now she’s going to their side. It is sad that she’s turned her back on us.”

Honestly I’m not sure what I think about this. I’ve avoided writing about it because I can’t resolve two conflicting feelings:

1. I am sad she’s skinny again. There, I said it. I know that I’m supposed be all girl power and say that whatever makes her happy makes me happy but the truth is that I am disappointed. She was a hero to me because she bucked the trends and proved that beautiful is not a size or body type. Now she looks just like all the other models.

2. BUT. It’s absolutely not my business what she weighs, how she got there or how she feels about it. It’s her business. In every sense of the word. And I hope, for the record, that the answers are healthy, healthfully and happy. But even if they’re not, it’s still not mine to comment on.

See, I know shouldn’t care. But I do. It doesn’t help that the Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Edition is the absolute epitome of catering to the male gaze. Although I am grateful she hasn’t done any stupid tabloid covers showing her frowny in a “fat” pic and smiley in a bikini proclaiming “I lost half my body weight and you can too!” Having sat on this one for a good week, I have come to conclude that this is simply more evidence how bad it is to compare ourselves to anyone else. Crystal Renn is just gorgeous and one of the most photogenic people on the planet, no matter what she weighs. That’s why she’s a model. And also, maybe I’m just jealous.

I’m hoping you guys can help me sort this all out. Do you have feelings one way or the other on this issue? Am I nuts that I hate the SI spread or jealous? Should I just get over myself already and realize that people change and that’s fine?

55 Comments

  1. I don’t know that I know the answer to any of your questions, but I do know one thing. She looks healthy and not waif thin and starving like most runway models. I see curves and some fat and if people are going to be models, I would rather see them looking like her than the collar-bone protruding type (like her teen years). Just my 2 cents.

    • I agree with Krista. To me she looks as healthy as can be in the last picture. In both the first and the second picture she looks unhealthy. For me health is about being able to function in your day to day life, to run a mile if you need to, to pick up heavy stuff, to not have emotional issues that make you overeat or undereat.

      I really don’t feel like she’s betrayed anyone, but I do hope that she’s honest when she says this new weight loss is due to healthifying her life and not falling back to an eating disorder.

  2. Hoo-boy. I have to say my first reaction was a bit of shock, followed by disappointment. As a current size 14, I’m trying REALLY hard to accept my body as it is (I was a size 10 five years ago). Plus-sized models give me hope, and formerly plus-sized models make me sad.
    But it’s not about me.
    It’s about her. As you say, it’s about what makes her happy, and she seems healthy. The fact is, a size 6 is larger than most models, and she does look more athletic than the typical waif-like 19 year-olds the industry loves so much.
    But…
    Is it wrong that I wish she’d stayed a larger size?

  3. I’m sad. I’m not sad because she went from plus-size down to “normal size,” I’m sad she went from normal to model-size again. There seems to be no one in the middle!! It’s not so much sad for her (she actually looks quite good in the swimsuit pic, not anorexic or too thin), I’m sad because there’s no realistic person out there to aspire to – it’s all extremes – either plus size or waif-like.

    I look very close to her size (maybe a tad bigger, since I’m shorter), and I would love to have a realistic person to look to – someone who got to a size 8 or 10 U.S. and stayed there. When I lose weight (I’m a yo-yo dieter) and get into my 10s, I still feel fat and overweight, clothes still don’t fit or look right, and “society” still views me as fat. I get very self-defeating in my head, saying to myself “well, gee, if I’m fat at a size 14 or a size 10, I may as well be a 14 and enjoy my cake!” And my weight creeps back on. It’s a very bad cycle and one I am still trying to stop as I am at the top of my yo-yo once again (after dropping to mid-point last spring/summer). Sigh.

    • I totally agree…I was a size 10 in 2010, a 12 in 2012, and now I’m a size 14 in 2014… lol. But I still felt fat/feel fat at all of those sizes and while it was easy to maintain my size 10 at the time, as I got older it is harder and harder to lose weight. Like you said if people are still going to think of us as fat in a size 10 and if size 10-12 clothing is put on racks as size “large”, we may as well eat what we want. I never wore a bikini as a size 10 because I didn’t think I could pull it off. And looking at myself in pics now I’m even afraid to wear anything but bermuda shorts/capris. But I see college age girls who are size 16+ wearing those nike running shorts with the built in underwear that are very trendy right now. And I try not to judge.

  4. Verbal diarrhea ahead…

    I do truly hope that she made positive healthy changes to lose the weight. I have her book on my kindle and haven’t read it yet – I wonder if I’ll be calling b*llsh*t the whole time?

    Have you every noticed all the celebrities that first say “I love my body and I don’t care what society thinks” the moment a “fat” picture comes out, but then miraculously lose 40 pounds?

    I remember a conversation I had with my mom a while ago about celebrities losing weight. They not only have access to the food and gyms because of status and money, but they have the extra motivation. Their paycheck depends on looking good. Would I have a strict regimen if my job and livelihood depended on it? Sure. But that isn’t an excuse to be unhealthy about it. It does make it difficult for a “commoner” like myself to understand their position though.

    End verbal diarrhea.

  5. I think she looks healthy and and she sounds happy. And I feel blessed that my job does not involve people scrutinizing my weight ups and downs and how I got there 🙂

  6. Normally I really love your blog posts – you are so full of insight and not afraid to share your thoughts, no matter what they are!
    But I’m not at all pleased with this blog post and I don’t think me stating that makes me any better than what I’m thinking about this particular post. However, I think its more of a state of our society – why does it matter at all how much someone weighs? Yes, she is in a profession that greatly relies on her looks, but her job isn’t who she is. And maybe she was in a stage in her life before where being “plus” sized worked for her. But maybe things have changed for her – no one is ever static in who they are. I’m just not sure why it matters to anyone what size she is.

    Maybe this is just where I’m coming from in my life right now – as a nurse my priorities are different. I see bodies in terms of health, not something that needs discussing at great length from aesthetic perspective, especially if its not my own body. I’ve also been through a great tragedy lately, and I think that further changes my priorities on whats important. So I must say – if what a model size is, is a concern to you – you have a very blessed life.

    • I do, indeed, have a very blessed life:) Although I will say that Renn’s weight loss is not my only (or even most pressing) concern… But yes, this comment is exactly why I sat on this post for a week without publishing it. Like I wrote, I *know* I shouldn’t care. I know it’s probably wrong to be talking about it at all. But I can’t get it out of my head and I finally put this up hoping that you guys could give me some perspective on it. Which you did beautifully, with this: ” I see bodies in terms of health, not something that needs discussing at great length from aesthetic perspective, especially if its not my own body.”

      I’m not trying to bash Renn. I’m more trying to figure out what’s wrong with me that I can’t let this go.

  7. Crystal Rein is a model, what she looks like IS her job and therefore it’s completely up for discussion.

    I think when you work in a field that is all about your looks and your weight, and you make a big deal about gaining weight and being happy, it’s natural that people will notice your massive weight loss and question whether it’s really healthy and natural. If you don’t want that scrutiny, then change careers.

    I’m cynical and I really don’t believe that hiking and yoga leads to massive weight loss just like that. I think she realised that she could get more work being model thin again so she worked hard and lost the weight. I have more respect for someone like Julianne Moore who admitted that actresses have to work really hard to stay thin because it’s part of their jobs, than someone denies the hard work that goes into getting thin and staying thin (for the majority of people).

    I’m disappointed in Ms Rein for making such a big deal about being happy and then losing weight to ‘fit in’. That said, I’ve never expected models to represent me – I’m never going to be that thin and that’s fine.

  8. Well, although there is a part of me that was like “What? Nooooo!” when I read the headline on this post (I hadn’t heard about it yet), I do still know that it’s her right to do whatever she wants with her body, and I can’t imagine the enormous pressure she was under from the fashion industry to lose weight…not to mention she probably made way less money as a plus-sized model, and everyone’s gotta keep a roof over their heads, y’know?

    The one thing that does make me feel betrayed, though, is the fact that she’s downplaying how much work it took to lose the weight. Like many people, I seriously doubt that she went from a curvy 14 to an athletic 6 (and keep in mind, she’s a model, so she’s probably tall, so her “size 6” would probably be more like a 2 or 0 for a woman of average height) by doing yoga and going on occasional hikes! Mostly because it implies that she didn’t used to do those things when she was fatter, even though she probably DID do those things before. I guess I feel like there’s this implication of “well I was a big fat blob, but then I got my ass off the couch and look what happened!” (HAHA that is not how it works)

    • I totally agree with your point about acting like weight-loss is easy!

      I’m sorry, but you absolutely cannot get a fabulously toned body like that by just hiking occasionally and doing yoga. Doesn’t happen. I think it is an insult to the average woman’s intelligence when it comes to weight-loss.

    • That’s all actually very possible. Note she never said she did yoga “occasionally,” by the way. My numbers aren’t exactly like hers, and I’m not as toned as her, but I wasn’t that far off and I’m tall (5’10). I do yoga once or twice a week for stress, I walk the dog and I eat mindfully (which usually ends up being healthfully). I got to a point where I was happy with my body and how I felt and the changes were gradual and crept up on me. I have no idea how she did it, but it’s entirely possible to change your body by following what she did. Yoga’s an incredible muscle-building and -toning workout, even at once or twice a week. Saying it’s not possible is actually insulting for people who DID do it.

  9. When I look at her SI picture I see a healthy, fit woman – not a skinny, minny model. Yes, she did lose weight but she is no where near as skinny as most models are. So there is that.

    Also it bothers me that once women are fuller they have to stay that way so as not to upset anyone. Can that really be the goal? Yes, I have a problem when they don’t own up to the time, money and effort it took to lose the weight, but do they have to stay a certain way just to make others happy? Isn’t that part of what was wrong in the first place when she was an anorexic model trying to be skinny?

    While weight isn’t everything in determining a persons health – a slightly overweight person that exercises is generally healthier then a skinny, inactive person – at a certain weight it just isn’t good for the body, however “happy” you might say you are with your body. I am not saying that overweight people shouldn’t be happy with their bodies, but I find it dangerous if being happy isn’t seen as being part of being healthy. If being happy with your weight becomes an excuse for living an unhealthy life i think it’s time to reevaluate.

  10. She looks healthy (even healthier) to me but there-in lies the problem- she could be healthy or she could not…. she could be over-exercising and restricting to get down to that weight but she could be eating small portions of healthy foods and doing lots of hiking and yoga. She could be happy and free or tortured by calories and carbs. We can’t know, nor should we dwell on it! What she does is her business, he life, her job, her body. Please don’t let someone else’s body get you down. The issue’s similar to your post of fit/thinspo… if you can detach yourself from the comparison mentality you’ll feel so much better.
    I just hope she’s happy and healthy.

  11. She looks really healthy in the SI photo. And why can’t she loose the weight with hiking and yoga and most likely an improved clean diet?

    I’m currently a size 16/18, not a model but will people hate on me for loosing weight and getting healthy? I hope not.

  12. The latest photos are not quite the same as her teenage anorexic years. Yes, she has lost weight since her plus sized days, but she’s not a waif nor stick thin. She looks healthy and strong. Everyone’s “normal” (the weight at which their bodies settles and is comfortable) is different based on their body type/frame, so I disagree with those who are upset that it took her struggling to get there. The issue is perhaps those plus sized days she wasn’t at her normal and despite declaring her happiness at being plus sized, perhaps she wasn’t. After all, she was much more popular as a plus sized model, and it could have been a natural backlash to being excessively thin. Now she’s no longer on either side, she’s settled at a happy medium for her. Personally, I have struggled with keeping my weight down for quite a while, but it wasn’t until I had kids and finally settled into being happy and enjoying my life that my weight settled and it wasn’t a struggle to keep it there. At 5’10, I was a 10/12 for quite awhile before settling to a 6/8 without killing myself over diet and exercise.

  13. What bothers me about this is that what everyone says is true and all the conflicting emotions make sense. But frankly given the industry she is in coupled with the past eating disorder chances are she didn’t make peace with food and rediscover her natural body weight which just happens to be this size. The simpler and more depressing answer is that the eating disorder has returned and she is battling obsessive eating disorder thoughts.I have never seen any model or movie star start with yes I have an eating disorder. They always say oh I do yoga and walk and eat what I want or worse you the ones that have a BMI under 18 and say I eat whatever I want and don’t ever exercise. Looking at her picture really isn’t the best way to judge becaue almost all models and actresses have very low body fat and body weight and so we are geared to look at them with a different lens. The truth is I can no better say then anyone else whether she is heatlhy and has made peace with food and this is just her body re regulating to its true natural size or whether she is suffering from the pain of an eating disorder. I do not judge her either because it is hard to recover from an eating disorder and even harder while still in a profession that emphasizes weight so much. It is almost like an alcoholic working at a bar- did anyone ever really think that on Cheers Sam Malone could have owned that bar? I feel sad for every woman suffering from eating disorders past or present or any woman who frequently hates herself for her weight or size that sees this picture and thinks why can’t this be me or has to cope with triggered eating disordered thoughts. I especially hate how the media paints all of this to make it so much worse. I am also torn as since she wrote a book about it I guess it does open things up to isn’t it a bit hypocritical of her. But overall it makes me sad because even ifshe isn’t sick these pictures and this story has surely made some women’s day a little tougher. For the record I really think she looks best in her first picture and at least for a moment in time she celebrated that shape. Because honestly all of our shapes and sizes have good and bad about them and we will be much more empowered as women when we embrace and celebrate a much wider variety of shapes and sizes.

  14. I hate to admit that if I only saw the SI picture and not her “plus sized” days pictures, I would think she looked like a beautiful healthy woman. However, given the circumstances , I do kind of feel a little “meh” about the reaction this is garnering. She looked beautiful heavier and she looks beautiful now, but I hate base anything solely on appearances.

    Given my own issues, I know that it’s impossible to paint any sort of picture based only on looks. If she’s healthier and happier now, more power to her. If she did it only to fit some assumed ideal, that would be truly disappointing. Either way, I would love to look like her–both presently and as she was as a “bigger” woman. She looks feminine and real.

  15. Jealousy makes people say ridiculous things. Crystal Renn is successful and beautiful regardless of her size. She is such an incredibly versatile model – she makes Linda Evangelista look like a piker. Most models just get radical haircuts to change their look- ha! Crystal lost weight and has exploded with creativity and diverse looks – NOT a bad thing!

    Crystal is a wonderful artist and she is not betraying the fat girls. People like Madeline Jones are ignorant, jealous and downright foolish to suggest that Crystal (or any other model) shouldn’t be the size that they are for ANY reason. DUH! Is anyone surprised that Ms. Jones is obese herself?

  16. I might be in the minority here, but my reaction is, “good for her!” If she really lost the weight for herself, not for anyone else or for her career, I’m very happy for her. As someone who’s been a size 12 and is now an 8 trying to get back into my 6s, I can’t judge her. And she’s not anorexia-thin anymore, she looks healthy. She probably feels better; I know I feel better every time I feel another “roll” smooth out (sorry for the gross visual, haha!). I wish women would stop picking on each other… it seems like someone has something catty to say whether a model/celebrity gains weight, loses weight, loses pregnancy weight too fast, becomes too fat during pregnancy… it goes on and on. I think she looks great and shouldn’t have to worry about “betraying” anyone except herself.

  17. I say good for her, she looks great both ways. Definitly more fit than skinny as an adult. That teenage pic is a little scary skinny. I’m a pediatric Nurse and I see kids with eating disorders all the time so when I see pics like that I immediately wonder if there’s a problem. Most (not all, of course there are exceptions) grow out of ‘naturally skinny’ when they hit puberty. Kids need a much higher caloric intake than adults, especially if they play sports, because they are in a growing phase not a maintaining phase. I’m constantly telling my kids to stop eating crap at the same time as I’m saying eat eat eat… But they roll their eyes and think I’m crazy, per usual.

  18. Stuff like this bugs me, only because she is gorgeous. I love that she is modelling at all sizes. Her weight shouldn’t be an issue. She can model things and feel good about herself at whatever weight she is. If she was plus sized and decided to be a bit more dialed in on nutrition and fitness and got thinner, why is that bad? How is she betraying people by just doing what feels good for her. I think that if she can come away from an eating disorder and love herself at whatever size she is and still be a model as a career, well good for her. She seems to be really level and looks after herself. That’s really a positive role model in that crazy world.

  19. I read her book and it was so sad. anoreixa is such a deceitful and destructive condition.
    as far as that SI swimsuit photo, i don’t know when that was taken, but I’ve seen semi recent pics of her far thinner than that. So, either that’s an older photo of her in the midst of losing all her weight, or a newer one after she decided she was too thin and started putting some back on.

    As far as losing all the weight after being plus size, it all depends on her motive. Only she and God TRULY know that. Of COURSE she’ll say it was to get healthy. who wouldn’t? she would never say, i want to be super skinny because i have an eating disorder and i want to do high fashion.
    So, who knows.
    We can only hope and pray she gets/stays healthy.

  20. Well I have to admit this is all a little strange to me. I try to be health oriented in my viewpoints, but I also am a man and have visual tendencies. That said, I think she looks great in each photo. I really do not see why one sees her as anorexic as a teenager just because her clavicles are noticeable. Sometimes it seems to me that there is an obvious bias towards being too heavy now a days because so many people struggle with their weight. I do not like hearing “skeletal, skin and bones, etc,” any more than I like hearing “fatty” or other derogatory terms for an individual.

    In my opinion, It is quite possible to be slender without an eating disorder, much more possible actually than to be obese without an eating disorder.

    • If you read her book as she describes her weight and how little she ate, and see other photos of her as a result of that lack of eating, you’d understand why she and others describe her as being anorexic.

  21. Hmm. I don’t know too much about her at all, but what I can say is:

    1) If she was making money, doing interviews, writing books all on how she was unhealthy before and loved her “plus size” body, it seems a bit disingenuous to just lose weight and become not plus size (I’d say she isn’t as skinny as some models out there, but for sports illustrated she’s pretty standard. Get too skinny and you loose your boobs and curves). If she had talked about it, or mentioned “Hey, I’m not actually happy with how I am, and I’m going to chance”, fine, that’s great. It’s not really so much about her weight as about how she sold it. If she was really so happy with herself, why did she change? If she WASN’T happy, why did she write books and tell everyone she loved her body? If she is happier and fitter and healthier this way, great, but TELL US. I think a lot of people’s disappointment stems not from her weight gain but the feeling she lied about how she felt about her body. Normally I would say who cares about her weight, but she was making a living talking about it!

    2) How long did she drop from sight for? I think it is difficult but perfectly possible to lose weight the way she describes (as long as you watch what you eat) and do it in a healthy way. The part about being angry at her describing annoys me. She didn’t say it was easy- but there seems to be this idea out there that just because for most people it is really really hard, anyone who does it has to be doing something unhealthy. That isn’t true. Looking at her thighs, I totally believe she hikes (I used to hike too. It makes your legs look great…but not teensy tiny).

    In conclusion, in my opinion, is it fine to be mad she sold herself one way and then totally contradicted herself? Yes. Is it fine to snark on her because it is difficult to lose weight?? No! She looks healthy and happy and how she describes her routine sounds healthy. So good for her for being able to do something so hard. I just wish she had told the public that she really wasn’t happy with her old body- because if she WAS happy, she wouldn’t have lost the weight. As I said above, losing weight is hard. It doesn’t happen by accident.

  22. I find it odd that her diet is not mentioned – only hiking and yoga. True, those two things will not help you lose weight unless you are eating in a caloric deficit. If she were eating like she used to, there is no way she would be that size. She has definitely changed her diet and is eating far less. I just think it’s odd that the food aspect is not the hot topic since diet is king in weight loss.
    I am glad for her if she’s ok but dieting and ED’s make a deadly combination.

  23. Like you, I’m not quite sure what to think! I guess a bit sad but not judgmental… my irritation is with the culture we live in, not with how individuals decide what’s best for them in terms of feeling happy and fitting in.

    Thanks for a balanced and insightful post… and I can’t wait to find out more about the today show!!! For those of us frequently away from tv’s, please keep us posted if there’s anywhere we can see it online!

  24. *feh*

    It’s her body.

    She sounds healthy and happy in her interviews,
    and she’s a smart cookie.

    I totally understand feeling disappointed that she lost weight again,
    but that’s her business, not ours.

    As long as she lost weight for her own sake,
    and not because she was pressured into it,
    it’s all good.

    What’s remarkable to me is that she looks *gorgeous*,
    no matter what she weighs–
    it’s like she has three happy weights!–
    and that DOES make me jealous! 🙂

  25. I think she looked great “plus sized” and she looks great now. Maybe she secretly hated being a plus-sized model? Maybe she really did love being plus sized but then made some lifestyle changes and the weight dropped off? Maybe she’s relapsed? Who knows. But I think one major problem we as a society have is that we look to models and celebrities for a way to identify ourselves and that is a problem. People are not meant to be each others heroes or heroines. We are all only human doing the best we can. To feel betrayed by her seems extreme.

  26. I loved her at her heavier size, but she looks fit in the SI shoot and still more realistic than most. I think she looks like a healthy woman. She’s got reasonable body fat and lots of muscle tone, so you can tell she works out. She’s closer to my size now, so I look at her and think, gee I could look like that if I lost a 5-7 pounds. I agree she was a body love inspiration at her 14-16 days, and still drop dead beautiful. Now she looks athletic, and inspirational (to me at least). I think I might be more sad if she lost weight beyond what looked good on her (eg pretty much anything lower than she is now).

  27. Its disturbing to me that the plus size “community” (a dumb term, but you know what I mean) felt that she owed them something and then betrayed them. I think some of that betrayal stems from saying “see, bodies don’t change, diets don’t work” and then it turns out that her body did change and hiking and yoga do work. And even if she ate less, why is that bad? Why does anyone think they have a say in what she weighs?

    She looks amazing in that SI shoot. She’s not model thin, she’s strong and healthy. Look at that thigh!

    I just keep my eyes on my own paper, and I live my own life. I hope that other people are happy with theirs.

  28. “what I really loved about it was hopeful it felt – that there was a way to be beautiful at the weight your body was meant to be at.

    Not trying to get all psychoanalyze-y here, I promise… but when I read that it made me think of when I was first recovering, and I kept looking to other people who had recovered as though I were looking for proof from them that it was possible to be recovered and not-unhealthy-thin and still happy. I wonder if part of the feeling upset over her losing weight is the same thing – feeling like she was proof that you could be happy and beautiful, not just heavier but recovered, and have it last – and then she goes and loses the weight again after all.

    And I will say this, as someone who has recovered – often you initially gain a decent amount of weight (at least in my experience), but you later lose some of it, naturally, after your body sort of levels out again (and gets out of starvation mode). Some of that may be natural. And, again just my experience, but I do yoga for the same stress-management reason, and have lately seen a big change in my body (though, oddly, my weight has stayed almost exactly the same), but I’ve lost a dress size without trying to and my proportions have changed – some areas are smaller, and some are bigger now. I’m definitely stronger (without trying and without really even realizing until one day it was like whoa, since when can I do this?). So it may really be that her body came out of starvation mode and her metabolism came back (which can take years), combined with the yoga, and it truly was natural. Or maybe she relapsed and crash dieted. Who knows. But it *could* have been healthy, and doesn’t automatically mean she relapsed. Maybe? Just my thoughts and speculation based on my personal experiences.

  29. I can understand your conflicting feelings #1 and #2 and I admire your bravery in sharing your feelings and thoughts.
    I firmly believe that other people’s bodies or body changes must be none of my business. Same with other people’s looks. Or what they eat (on not) or what exercise they do (or not). Otherwise I am judging others and contributing to this size/looks/food/exercise obsessed society.
    Plus I have more than enough to think about if I concentrate on myself. 🙂

  30. First, I must say that at any size, she is totally gorgeous and photogenic. I do prefer her “normal” to “plus sized” even though her weight or any one elses is none of my business. There is a bit of feeling of betrayal. Oddly enough, it is the same feeling I felt when some of the healthy lifestyle bloggers I like became full time bloggers. I felt betrayed because they were now able to devout more time to eating healthy and exercising because they no longer had the challenges of balancing all of that with a job. (I do consider taking care of your large family to be a full time job and you outdo yourself with all your side writing projects).

  31. Like you said, I know that I should say that whatever makes her happy makes me happy so long as she’s healthy.

    But, I’m also sad she’s skinnier. My story is very similar to Renn’s, except I never got to the size she did and I left the industry before I completely compromised myself. I read her book over three times when I was in the modeling industry and when I got out, when I was in the middle of an eating disorder and when I regained weight after I had lost.

    I loved the image of health and beauty she portrayed as a plus sized model. I feel like she sold out, even if I shouldn’t. She was and is so beautiful–but I wish she was still a plus sized model. She encouraged me so much, and now…It’s confusing.

  32. I guess I just don’t understand why anyone would be disappointed in someone for losing weight or gaining weight. Its not like her weight has any bearing on our lives one way or the other. If someone feels that way based off the actions of another person, I think the problem lies not with the person who lost the weight. I don’t know anything about her, but I think she looks great in the SI photo! Definitely not stick skinny like the one above that. She’s beautiful in all three, and maybe she genuinely did feel better at a larger size, but lost weight and still feels great. Why does that matter?

  33. Honestly? She looks great either way. At least she isn’t emancipated. She is voluptuous and beautiful to me.

  34. I think if she is happy and feels healthy…then judos for her no matter what her weight is…she was beautiful at both sizes…but come on really…Im a size 19…and Id rather be a six. It is no body’s business to tell her where she should be! This is her path…not yours…you want a plus size role model…be one!

  35. I think she looks really healthy and fit in the newest picture, not underweight and scary looking like many mainstream models. Many of us go through our ups and downs with our weight, and model or not I don’t think it’s anyone’s business unless she chooses to talk about it.

    I think she looks great in the plus size photo and in the last photo. I’m happy for her that she looks healthy (unlike the middle photo) at either weight. Good for her.

  36. How about GIVE ME A BREAK. This is the stupidest, most worthless thread of discussion I have come across. BETRAYED by how a MODEL looks? What are we? A group of thin haters? Healthy-people floggers? For starters, she’s beautiful as a waif, a plus-size or a straight model. Who cares about anything else? Articles like this make me cringe. I am a big girl who is healthy, strong and has recently thrown out my scale due to the unnecessary pressure surrounding it. I am a working mom, a triathlete and who I want to be. Would I like to be thinner? Yes. Are people going to do a post about the formerly “fat” half-Ironman who’s now thin and does full Ironmans, and judge me accordingly if I lose weight? Will they mumble, “she betrayed us by losing weight and getting healthier”? Renn is sinfully GORGEOUS by any stretch of the thin or fat imagination. It’s HER life. Stop writing stupid crap like this and write content to EMPOWER women about the bodies they LIVE IN (whether thin, fat or otherwise) and stop staring, analyzing and making a freaking big deal about whether that body changes, and whether you “should” raise applause or eyebrows.

  37. Bravo, Swim Bike Mom
    Honestly, the woman looks great. She looks fit. She’s doesn’t appear to be anorexic, and her muscle tone is very nice. She looks like a pretty normal woman, to be honest. What a lot of us would look like if we cut out bad snacking habits, exercised daily and ate great, whole foods (in normal portion sizes). Check out French women. A lot of Europeans look like her, and they come by it naturally. Most of our citizens here in N. America are of European stock, so we should probably have the same, if not similar genetics. It comes down to how we live our lives.

    Why must other women cut other women down? That’s really at the crux of the matter. I could go off the rails and cut down plus sized models because their weight is off the charts or their BMI is too high, but I don’t.

    Critiques like this stem more from insecurity than anything else. Remember that someone else’s “win” doesn’t equal a “loss” to you. Cheer her on, because she obviously looks and feels good about herself!!

  38. P.S. I guess I should add that her “anorexic” pic also looks like what used to constitute “normal early teenage girl.” Look at pics of girls from the 1960s…. often American girls were slender like her. And, she looks to be only 13, so that could easily be why she was so slim…..

  39. Although she was gorgeous as a plus sized model and whether or not she was a champion for the boundaries of beauty, SHE may not have been all that happy with herself. I don’t see anything wrong about her working to lose weight and get healthier, as long as she did it sensibly and in a healthy manner.

  40. Last week we watched a vintage James Bond (1965), the thing that amazed me was how the “Bond Girls” of ’65 had beautiful bodies with curves that would be a called “plus-size” today. What has happened to our way of thinking, who made us think skinny is beautiful?

    We need to have more normal size models so our daughter won’t be continually comparing themselves to what the “industry” thinks is beautiful.

  41. I’ve never heard of her. She looks great in both photos. I’m not sure why you care. (i mean that as a sincere question not sarcastic at all) All I will say is that you are beautiful Charlotte. I wish you would just believe it and stop thinking about these things. I don’t criticize you for writing this post even if i dont give two cents about whatever her name is. You are bravest blogger I know and wear your heart on your sleeve. I just want peace for you. And me. And her. (((hugs)))

  42. I just love that there’s some visibility for someone whose weight fluctuates, without that visibility being framed as a ‘success’ or ‘failure’ story–just part of life and ED recovery. I’ve gone from (severely) anorexic –> weight regain well over setpoint –> healthy and fit (where I am now), and I had no idea anyone else had ever gone through anything of the kind until recently.

    Other than that, I have no feelings on the weight loss, except that I hope she feels good and remains healthy! And, apparently, it IS pretty usual, after anorexia, to regain excess fat and then lose it.

  43. I’m all over whatever makes people happy and feel good about themselves and be healthy.

    I think there’s way too much judgment on weight and how people look as a general rule. I’m still really disappointed in the people who I thought were my friends that told me I “looked too skinny” when I was healthy-thin, because that played a big role in my weight gain, and now I’ve veered towards being slightly overweight and NOT pleased with it. I lost weight in the first place in order to be healthier, and it makes me really sad that I didn’t get the support I needed from my friends and family once I lost the weight.

    People do change, and we need to accept that, and be the support they need – including for celebrities!

    And that magazine with the “she’s gone to their side” quote – that’s BS. Why are women battling other women and looking at it as “us vs. them”? We’re all women! We should be encouraging each other, not trying to pick sides and such.

    (I feel kinda strongly about this issue :)).

  44. Good on you Charlotte for being honest about how you feel about Crystal, because your candidness is what I (and other’s I’m sure) have come to love about your blog.

    Here’s my two cents. It seems to me that you (and a few others in the comments section) feel betrayed by Crystal’s changing shape. Even though many admit she looks quite healthy in the SI shoot, but looked equally sexy as a “plus sized model” there seems to be a pervading sense that Crystal has somehow turned her back on the rest of us just trying to live a healthy life and trying not to get hung up on our weight. Because we used her as a poster girl for our own body issues, to justify our insecurities and vilify other’s prejudice. “See, big is beautiful”. “Phew, I don’t have to starve myself to look like a model”.

    Here’s the thing tho – it still all comes down to comparison. Comparison of other’s to ourselves. Comparison of our past selves to our present selves. Comparison of model’s past size to their current size.

    And when comparisons are made and judgement’s are passed, you miss out on the joy of the present.

    Charlotte, be proud of where you are today and go forth into your future with joy.

  45. What really strikes me about all of this is that I wonder what was going on behind the scenes that caused her to take steps to change her body. Like, was she getting a lot of pressure to lose weight? Did she feel like she would be more successful if she did so? Her body is really none of my business but I do find it curious that a woman who made her name writing a book about embracing her plus-size figure after battling an eating disorder has lost a lot of weight.

  46. She’s entitled to figure out what her natural set point is.
    She went from being very under her meant-to-be weight. To probably over it. . . . Maybe she’s under it now . . .

    But, she’s entitled to figure that out for herself.

    If she’s doing excessive things and efforts to be a weight that she is not genetically meant to be, and must struggle to maintain that low weight- that’s her effort and her struggle.

    But we can’t assume that thats the case. We can’t assume that she is exerting alota effort to maintain a low(er) weight than she should be.

    And if she is, then thats for her to contend with.

    I’d say, give her a wide berth- a bit of breathing room for now. Don’t hang your expectations and judgements on her.

    And if she wants to tell us in a bit of time “omg, i cant maintain this weight” then, thats up to her.

    Or, maybe shes living a fulfilling and healthy life at the weight she is now. Maybe it is not a struggle that is interfering with her life (daily hours of exercise say). Maybe that is the accurate scenario and so how her private life is lived each day.

  47. have you seen her recently? holy crap shes lost even MORE from those photos.

  48. Pingback:Curvy, Skinny, Make it Real. « Somewhere Purple

  49. She entered the industry soo young and vulnerable. And ended up developing an unhealthy way to maintain her weight and health. Anorexia is and was traumatizing to her. She embraced her weight gain but I don’t think she ever wanted to be that heavy. She even says in an interview how she was afraid to do any kind of exercise because of how she associates it with her past experiance. Old habits die hard. She was afraid it would come back if she tried at all.

    This is her path. She had to experiance it in extremes to get to where she is now. I think its impressive she even found a way to live a normal healthy lifestyle after what she had been through. I think its impressive she found a way to love her body at any weight after being anorexic. She overcame it in steps and found a way to love herself through it. We should all aspire to that.

    I know I’m adding to this over a year too late lol but I just hate when people judge someone for this crap. She overcame something most people struggle with their whole lives. She’s happy. Let her be happy and try focusing on what will make you happier in life.