Fall is perfect outdoor weather and my favorite season to run in. There’s nothing like the crisp air, the colorful leaves and the sunshine to really make you move! But just like every other season it can take some wardrobe adjustments as you move from as-little-as-decency-allows to layer city. Do you like really unique and funky patterns? Do you like quality? But most importantly, do you like to have well-ventilated nethers? Then you have to try these YMX by Yellowman pants:
I’ll admit I’ve always loved Yellowman for their designs. I used to drool over them in the Athleta catalog and imagine how serene I’d look slamming someone’s (imaginary) head into my knee whilst decorated in such zen artwork. And since it’s against my religion to get tattoos (I’m LDS a.k.a. Mormon) this was about as close as I’m ever going to get to living out my dream of looking like this blogger.
Heck yeah I’m posting this pic again! Do you know how hard it is to show muscle definition on a pale girl?? This may be the only time my biceps ever come out of hiding and I’m gonna run with it. Oh wait, we’re talking about the clothes. Look at the beautiful lady on my boobs!
But it wasn’t until I ran in them* that I realized their true power: they are made out of the thinnest fabric imaginable. It’s kind of like running naked. In a good way. Sweat is so quickly wicked away that you never have to worry about sweat marks in embarrassing places. They were so light and airy that I had to keep looking down to make sure they were still situated properly. About halfway through my run it occurred to me that maybe they are supposed to be underwear. I mean a lot of workout clothing falls into that ambiguous spot between undies and overs, right? I blushed and imagined little censor bars over my naughty bits (for the record: you couldn’t see anything naughty, it just felt that way).
When I got home I emailed their rep to ask if they were meant to be a base layer or if people wore them as is and got the comforting response that either way was a-ok and that their special technical fabric was known for it’s lightness. Phew. I didn’t scandalize the neighbors then. This time. (Want to win your own naked outfit? See below!)
In other censored news, one of my posts for Redbook this week on “Kid-isms – words kids hilariously mispronounce” ended up posted quite a bit shorter than I wrote it. I understood my editor’s reasoning but they axed the funniest parts so I had to put it up here in all it’s unedited glory:
My Top 10 Favorite Kid-isms (Uncensored version!)
One Christmas season as we were getting my tired 2-year-old son’s picture taken with Santa, I decided to don a Santa hat and make funny faces to help get him to smile. It worked, but not the way I had intended. My son, whose word for “Santa” was “ho” (shortened from “ho ho ho”), exclaimed loudly and clearly, “Hey my mommy’s a ho!” Believe me, there were a lot of smiles (and questioning looks) after that! One of the best parts of having kids is getting to hear the words they adorably mispronounce — “basgetti” for spaghetti, “alligator” for elevator, and all the variations on octopus — but sometimes these mispronounciations are hilariously disastrous. Read on for my favorites:
– “For our daughter, lotion sounded like “oh sh*t.” It was so funny, I’ve got a video of it posted on facebook.” ~Ted
– “My brother couldn’t pronounce my name when he was little and called me “wah wah” – I’m not sure it was as much a mispronunciation as it was admitting defeat, though, to be honest.” ~Forest
– “My son was 4 and a few days earlier we had eaten fish with hushpuppies. He wanted them again and asked if he could have some ‘dog balls’.” ~Kristen
– “I was standing in line with my young cousin when he was saw a backhoe out the window. He screamed enthusiastically and pointed outside and what everyone heard was: ‘bud….ho…le.’” ~Silke
– “From my son dump truck sounded exactly like ‘dumb f***’” ~Kathy
– “My one of my nephews used to call my husband, Scott, ‘Sock.’ We still sometimes refer to him as Uncle Sock.” ~Marie
– “When Sam was little Batman was ‘black-man’ So he used to always say, ‘When I grow up I wanna be a black man.’ ” ~Sara
– “At the grocery store, my son used to scream for ‘chicken fuggets’.” ~Laura
– “When she was about four, I caught Abby licking the salt off peanuts and them putting them back in the package. I asked her what she was doing and she said, ‘Licking Daddy’s peanuts.’ Only, ‘peanuts’ sounded an awful lot like a part of the male anatomy.” ~Michelle
– “My daughter’s /s/ and /sh/ both sound the same so sometimes I have to stop a minute when she says ‘sit’.” ~Courtney
– “Hailey called pimples ‘pinch balls’.” ~Beth
– “My son used to go to Fox School. He had a serious pronunciation issue with that one!” ~Alyssa
Other articles I did this week:
Mean Girl Mommies: What do you do? I didn’t know how to deal with mean girls in high school and I still have a hard time now – help me out?
Sushi, Artichokes and Cod Liver Oil? Weird Foods That Kids Love. Oddly this one got censored too. They took out the one where my friend Jeni said her daughter loves asparagus which she finds awesome because it makes her pee smell funny. Come on, who doesn’t smell their own pee??
Great Mom Debate: Do you let your toddler watch TV? The AAP recently released new guidelines recommending kids under two get zero screen time. The total lack of comments on this post makes me think that a) this is ridiculous and b) no one wants to admit to thinking it’s ridiculous because then we’re that mom.
Dentist Buys Kids’ Halloween Candy From Them. Brilliant solution to the candy dilemma? Or not as easy as it sounds?
And if you still need costume ideas, don’t forget to check out my slideshow for Shape on the 20 Best Fitness Icon costumes!
To win a YMX by Yellowman outfit of your very own, leave me a comment here telling me about your favorite season to be outdoors in. Or tell me if you’ve ever confused underwear for outerwear or vice versa? Contest ends Friday Nov. 3 at midnight. And for kicks – have you ever heard any hilarious kid mispronounciations?
*FCC disclosure: I was given one top and bottom to try out for free. I was not compensated in any other manner and all opinions are my own.