Hygiene is Overrated [Are you a sitter or squatter?]

Getting caught doing this during the Spanish Inquisition was a one-way ticket to the iron maiden. In medieval times doing it was believed to infect you with the Black Death. Early Christians considered it on par with idol worship. But of course the Romans were all about doing it. In public. For every occasion.

What is it? And no, it has nothing to do with the corporal punishment of monkeys.

It is bathing. Today, not bathing could get you a ticket to a mosh pit or a White Castle, both being the least-discriminating venues in our society. And though not bathing probably won’t infect you with the Black Death, you do start to smell funky after a bit. So while daily bathing will certainly make you less odiferous – especially if you workout every day – it isn’t necessary for good health. To be clear: I shower every day, mostly out of social convention I’m sure. But I only wash my hair a couple of times a week. (What? It styles so much better when it’s dirty!)

When it comes to social stigma, bathing is nothing compared to toileting. I’m usually a live and let live kind of girl but I get a little riled up about public restrooms. What plague it is that people are so afraid of getting that they must hover six inches above the toilet seat, misting it so it will be extra refreshing for the next girl?  Toilet seats are not actually as germy as people think making the hover manuever we all learned as kids unnecessary. That is unless you just like getting a good quad workout in which case I say your aim had better be impeccable.  Unless there is obvious splatter, I sit naked-cheeked on communal toilets. But then I’m generally kind of gross. I don’t mind sharing a fork with someone, even a stranger. I’ll shake anyone’s hand, pat any tot’s head and kiss anyone’s baby, although I do draw a line at kissing my mother-in-law on the lips which is difficult as she is a very insistent lip-kisser.

Thankfully I married a man with a similarly laissez-faire attitude. In our family, like our pioneer ancestors, our kids get a good dunk-n-scrub about thrice a week. In between baths, we do a “wipes bath,” which is exactly what it sounds like, to keep the kids smelling fresh enough to not alert their teachers to our negligent ways. We’ve also been known to count their weekly swimming lessons, telling the offspring to scrub between their toes whilst sitting on the edge of the pool waiting for their turn to have an intimate moment with a pool noodle.

What the Research Says

This will come as no surprise to you: washing your hands with soap (antibacterial is not necessary and may actually do more harm than good so just stick with regular) and water is the e=mc2 of the health world. Do it. And this is one of those things where I think it is totally appropriate to shame other people into doing it. Maybe it’s the mom in me but I’ve been known to tell complete strangers, “Oh is the soap out over there? Come use this sink, it’s got plenty.” when they look like they’re going to go straight from toilet to table at a restaurant.

Now that I’ve spilled my, ahem, dirty little secrets now I want to know – are you a squatter or a sitter? How many times a day do you shower? Does it feel weird answering deeply personal questions on the Internet??

Other places you can read me this week:

Top Ten Funniest Picture Day Outfits. You want to read this one. You will laugh, if only because you’re remembering your third grade picture where it looks like Lisa Frank threw up on you.

Can’t Remember Your Kid’s Name? Research Says Blame Birth Control. Kids make me forget stuff and now the act of preventing kids makes me forget stuff. I’d invoke a darned-if-you adage here except I can’t remember one.

Have You Ever Argued With Your Child’s Teacher? A painful experience with one of my sons made me, a former teacher, finally realize how impotent and infuriating it can feel to be on the other side of the desk.

The 4-minute Fat-Burning Miracle Workout. And no, it’s not just magazine hyperbole! How Tabata interval training revolutionized fitness.

50 Comments

  1. I’m a sitter. I usually grab some extra toilet paper and give the seat a quick swipe before sitting. I’ve heard you’re more likely to get sick in your kitchen or from your office phone/computer/desk than you are from sitting on a toilet seat in public, so I don’t worry too much. We are definitely not hygiene freaks by any means – I don’t carry antibacterial wipes, I let my kid eat Cheerios if they fall on the floor, etc., and we rarely get sick. My home is relatively clean, we wash our hands, so I figure we’re good to go.

    As for showering. . . I’d do it 2-3x a day if it wasn’t such a PITA. Seriously. I hate feeling sweaty or icky. And my head itches if I don’t wash my hair daily, since I have an oily scalp. However, given the time constraints and that I’m generally not crazy, I shower once per day unless I am going out or something and got icky earlier. Then it’s twice. But that’s super rare.

    And no, I honestly don’t feel that weird about answering these questions on the Internet. I’m all about oversharing in any form of communication! 😀 LOL!

  2. I’m a squatter. I learned this habit as a child, and it’s hard to change. In college, a friend of a friend pointed out that if EVERYONE sat, there’d be no grossness, because the stuff will go IN the bowl, not AROUND or ON the bowl. Makes sense. Still, I squat (hey, I’ve been doing the wall sits for a reason, right?).

    I’m afraid I’d have to turn in my girl card. I HATE showering. I hated it as a kid, and I hate it as an adult. If I don’t exercise on the weekend, then I don’t shower on the weekend. Unless I go out, because I don’t want people to think I smell. But I STILL hate it. I’ve read somewhere that it’s actually better for your skin to not bathe everyday, since it strips your skin of moisture. Thank you science =)

  3. I”m a squatter. Toilets and bathrooms in general gross me out. It’s one of those things that is going to make RV-ing for a year “interesting”…rest stops. Is there an app for cleanest public bathrooms.

    This is so gross but today I was in Sports Authority and there was poo on the floor. I almost threw up. What the heck. I don’t even want to know how that happens.

    I don’t like the water and hence I don’t like showering but I do it. It’s like flossing my teeth. I actually sort of feel the same way about workouts sometimes.

  4. I SIT!!!
    I used to hover and squat and, for some reason, with the advent of the child Ive given up.

    go me!! 🙂

  5. Sitter!

    Why? Because I am tall (5’11) and squatting that low requires major quads of steel and I’d rather just go to the bathroom that get a quad workout. So I sit. 🙂

  6. I’m ok with most public toilets and end up sitting…except for pit toilets out in the woods. And that’s not a hygiene thing, that’s because I KNOW there’s a troll or zombie or something living in every one of those just waiting for me to let my guard down. In fact, i’d rather risk wiping with poison ivy than even hover over one of those in the dark. Nope nope nope.

    • Troll or zombie!!! I love it! We think alike…I think I’ve seen too many crazy snake, alligator or crazy creature come out of the toilet movies!

  7. I sit. I wipe the seat off first and wash my hands after. I shower daily. Unless I get especially gross by the end of the day. Then I’ll shower again. My kids get a nightly bath, but it’s more about the bedtime routine than anything else. Although the five yo can get RANK after a summer day outside.

  8. From what I understand, urine itself is sterile, so it’s not a health hazard to sit. I am a sitter, and I have to say it infuriates me that some squatters won’t aim properly, flip up the seat like guys do, or even wipe up after themselves if they do sprinkle! I’m hoping that this post will serve as a reminder that not all women squat–which must be the mistaken impression women have who leave messy seats behind them. Or else why would they be so mean as to make us wipe up their pee?

    Though I agree with Kat about pit toilets and will squat to avoid zombies and trolls that live down there. They can only reach up and get you if your butt hits the seat.

  9. Totally a sitter. Squatting just seems like too much work.

    As for showering, I shower every day if I’m going to work and most Saturdays and Sundays. And while I get my hair wet 99% of the time, I only shampoo it every other day. I put conditioner on it every day, though. I’m also one of those gross people who doesn’t shower after a workout all the time.

  10. I sit too. My mom is all about the squat, but I think you get just as much splashback when you squat. Maybe more, since the urine stream builds up a greater velocity by traveling longer. How’s that for using science to justify my non-hygenic habits/laziness?

  11. LOL yup I think every girl knows the sit and squat once they are potty trained. I do cheat though cause on more than one occasion my trickle has trickled down my leg, so I put my hands on the seat and I sit on my hands. My booty never touches the seat and I get it all in the bowl with no fuss! I know too much info.
    With the bathing issue I shower everyday cause I workout a good sweat everyday and Sam normally joins me in the shower cause sitting while she takes a bath upstairs and socializing with the in laws has gotten quite old!

  12. Totally a sitter. I’m too lazy to hover. And I’ve never gotten pee on myself so boo-yah! As for showering, I used to wash my hair every other day, but now I’m pushing it to every 3 or 4 days. Kinda tought b/c I’m a blonde and the grease shows sooner, but luckily my hair is curly so that hides it a bit.

  13. I’m a sitter. My mom was a public health nurse for years, and never taught me to squat. She did emphasize checking to make sure you wouldn’t be sitting in someone else’s mess, and washing hands afterwards, but I figure hey, she’s employed to know public health, and she’s not dead yet, so squatting is excessive.
    I tend to shower daily, but that’s mostly because my toes feel yucky if I don’t shower in the morning. Even washing my feet independent of a shower doesn’t resolve the yucky feeling. it’s all in my head though, and I know it, so if I skip a shower, no biggie. I must shower after I exercise, though. I stink. It’s a favor to those around me, to bath after a workout.
    As for my kids – recently, they’ve been lucky to get a bath a week. I don’t know what’s up with that, though. I aim for 2 times a week, unless dirt necessitates great frequency.

  14. I am a sitter. Like Averie, I am 6 feet tall and squatting that low is a pain. The only time I do the squat is port a potties or pit toilets because I have some irrational fear that an animal might be down there. I do shower daily mainly because I have this horrible fine hair that is pancaked to my head if it doesn’t get a daily scrubbing.

  15. Most of the time I’m a sitter, but I always check the seat and/or give it a quick wipe down with some TP before I sit. Porta-Potties and vault toilets call for squatting most of the time because you need to move quickly for those animals (and trolls, apparently!).

    Sitting on an ice cold vault toilet seat with the cold air drafting up the hole at you on a brisk winter day after snowshoeing is a good reason to perfect the squat. I always check to make sure I didn’t sprinkle the seat because I’d definitely wipe my own up if I did!

    Also, there was the time I almost got attacked by a frog in a porta potty. Seriously. I look over as I’m finishing up and see him climbing on the seat! Good thing it was a squat day because as soon as I was done, I was able to jump away to pull up my pants. Scary!

  16. I’m a sitter. Drives me crazy when I go into a stall and a squatter has made a mess on he seat – if you don’t want to touch the seat, what makes you think I want to to wipe it clean after you….yuck. Just yuk… especially at a pub. Drunken squatting? Rediculous…
    It’s just excessive. I mean thebathroom is cleaned more than most rooms…and the germs aren’t going to leap up onto your bum and somehow absorb in…germs are small. They can get thru your pants too…you’d sit on a public bench or chair right? THOSE things are filthy a lot of the time. In undergrad we did a lab where we randomly swabbed various things to grow out the bacteria on them…the toilet seats were one of the cleanest things it turns out. Public phones tho…blech. I still can’t use one. IThing is, as a labworker ‘m nearly a germophobe and I don’t squat…it’s just unnecessary 🙂
    And you are right about the good old soap and water – use soap, lather well and sing happy birthday. When you’re done, that’s long enough time for your hands to be squeaky clean…it’s the way my mum (a nurse) taught me, and I’ve been retaught it in lab safety training. So many people don’t wash their hands…blech. Same with showers – I have one every day after a workout – I need one (I sweat!), but I do only wash my hair 3 times a week. It’s a time thing now that my hair is longer, and if it’s back in a braid, it looks fine.

  17. I’m a sitter. Usually, I’m so toilet-sore that i have a hard time even getting onto the toilet without collapsing and crushing it, let alone hovering over it for any length of time.

    As for showering, I usually take one monday morning after i swim, then hop in on friday, because by then I can’t remember the last time I was clean. I’d say I average twice a week, maybe more if i’ve had an exceptionally sweaty workout.

  18. I sit, unless the seat is particularly gross! And I shower every day in the summer, and every 1.5 days in the winter. When I was an eco-hippie, it was every 2 days to save water, but 1-1.5 works well for me!

  19. I’m a stander. But when sitting is required, I’m usually at home, so sitting is fine. Should the need arise to sit in a public restroom, there is never enough toilet paper or toilet seat paper rings to separate me from a toilet seat. If there’s not enough, I’ll find another rest room.

  20. I just saw Contagion and I’m generally freaked out my everything now. Still a sitter though.

    • Yikes, that movie looked terrifying. I had a news site as my home page that kept playing the preview for it over and over again… I had to change my home page for a few days, it was creeping me out too much!

      • It was a good movie though. It just doesn’t leave you uplifted. It made me realize just how much I touch my face throught the day.

        Last night while my husband and I were watching tv, a preview played for the movie and then the next commercial was for the VW Beetle where all the drivers were high fiving each other. Juxtaposition at its best.

  21. I sit. I check the seat first, wiping if necessary, and I always, always wash my hands afterwards. I rarely catch things, so something’s working!

    I bathe every day, before bed… can’t sleep right if I’m not clean.

  22. I’m a sitter who loathes the careless squatters out there. Be considerate!

    I shower on average 2-3x a week. I have uber dry skin that splits and cracks so THE WHOLE PROCESS just takes too damn long for me to do on a daily basis (i have to really really take the time to work the body cream in, the face cream in, work on my broken feet (really bad heels), de-tangle the long hair, dry the long hair in cold weather (I live in Toronto), … gah!)

    I envy the 20 minute shower to door ppl like my bf. I love the shower feeling I just hate all the after work required.

  23. This is refreshing! I am a sitter, but occasional squatter with awesome, flawless aim and I do it PURELY for the workout (or sometimes, at festivals with no tissue in the cubicle, out of sheer necessity). Now that is dedication to the fitness cause. And yes, if any splashes occur than I always do the “be a sweetie, wipe the seatie” thing. It’s only polite.

    Px

  24. I work in a multi-national company, and of course our bathrooms are nice and clean and we have some paper cover to use when sitting. However, we had people from another country (better not say, do not wish to offend) that were climbing on the toilet because you could see shoe marks on it. I can’t imagine how uncomfortable that position must be, when you spend more that 5 minute in there. So this is a new position.
    True story now: my tummy hurt so bad and I needed to go so badly, but in the bathroom there were those always perfect girls, putting some makeup, so I entered and had to wait in pain for them to leave so that they do no hear anything and know it was me

    • Me again, as I have responded to all questions:
      I sit only in my home and I clean bathroom after guests leave, then I can sit again
      I always wash my hands before and after going to the bathroom, I think is just as important to wash before and not touch the door, I use a napkin to open the door and lock it
      I shower each day, or more than once, but I remember that as a child I used to wash once a week 😀
      I used to wash my hair once a week also and my hair was happy, but when I reduced the time, my hair got unhappy, so now I wash it about every 4 days, even with going to the gym on each of the day, as someone said, the whole process takes too much time

  25. I do both,Sometimes a girl just has to use a port-o-potty, and there’s no way I’m sitting in one of those! I tend to go by the general cleanliness of the restroom, and also check the seat.
    I read once, a long time ago, that it’s possible to pick up herpes from a toilet seat. It’s since been disproven, but has stuck with me nonetheless.

    We also bathe our kids about 3 times a week. But we also bathe them after they go swimming: Hubby’s family has a history of eczema, so we don’t want their skin to dry out. And I wash my hair every 2-3 days, nothing more. I take a bath on the days I don’t wash my hair, usually with some yummy-smelling body wash. It’s kinda fun, deciding between peach, apple, and funnel cake!

  26. Sitter!!!

    Shower everyday (usually), but only wash my hair twice a week. On non-wash days, it’s a ponytail for me.

  27. I’m a sitter who resents the heck out of sprinkling squatters, AND I don’t wash my hands in public restrooms. I rinse, but I am sensitive to perfumes, and having the distracting stench of liquid soap on my hands for hours is just not worth it to me. I like to challenge my immune system anyway, and am generally pretty healthy (knock wood).

    I try to take the occasional day off from washing my hair, but I look like a total grease monkey 12 hours after showering, so if I’m going out in public, daily showering is pretty much required. And I have to shower after working out or my skin gets itchy.

  28. I squat 😀 I am paranoid, I can’t help it.

    I’m TRYING to cut down on hair washing because the gal who cuts my hair told me to. Except I cannot seem to get it to work. I am nothing if not Italian, apparently (no offense to other Italian grease monkeys! haha)

  29. It is the norm around these parts is to have paper covers available for the toilet seat, so that is what I use.
    Shower every day. I hate being even a little funky!
    Oh lord, and hand washing. Don’t even get me started. I am so adament about it. My husband will get home after riding a city bus and sit down to dinner without washing his hands and it makes me want to freak out. It’s my issue, I guess!

  30. Charlotte, so right there with you on the shampooing! I’ve come to realize that my fine highlighted hair actually looks better when I don’t shampoo for about 3 days! The rest of the time I just rinse it off while I shower. I’m down to about twice a week now. In fact I generally shampoo the day BEFORE I want it to look good, because it just doesn’t style as well after shampooing. Also, “rinse and repeat,” my azz.

  31. This post is so funny! I am a squatter but it seems like I am the minority! I figure I’ll burn a few extra calories by squatting. Haha!

    Xo
    Sarah
    Get Up & Go

  32. If you sprinkle when you tinkle, please be neat and wipe the seat!

    I saw that on a bathroom wall when I was like 12 (now, almost 50)… I (pause) am a toilet paper sitter… I lay three sheets of toilet paper in a make shift seat cover and plop. My mom tried to teach me the hover and finally gave up. Can’t hover and when I squat to pee on a camping trip i usually end up peeing all over myself.. I ask you, is it worth it?… as for bathing.. I bathe when I need to.. sometimes twice a day.. mostly once a day but yeah sometimes every other day (gasp, I know, whatever).. I just got back from a camping trip in the mountains of colorado where it was a “pits and privates” bath everyday for 4 days.. yeah, I couldn’t way to bathe like a real person… I wash my hair 2-3 times a week and it’s the healthiest it’s ever been.. as for answering personal questions on the internet? yeah, it feels a bit uncomfortable.. but I don’t make myself uncomfortable enough and it’s good to step out on occasion.. especially when it makes me smile…

  33. For me it depends… I know that sounds odd… but I’m normally a hover-girl… “squatter”

    occasionally though if I’m really sick… at the doctor’s office… or am incredibly tired I will sit. Provided I wipe the seat with baby wipes from my purse (or hand wipes – I usually have a pack on me and no I don’t have children)… and then toilet paper…

    If it’s at a really good friend or family members house… I’ll just see if it looks clean and then just sit… if it doesn’t… same rules apply that I mentioned earlier.

  34. oh and I realized I forgot the shower question.

    I judge a workout by the amount I sweat ( though it can also be a good tell of how well hydrated I was ) – this may sound gross…. but while I always shower if I have a good workout (I don’t count a quick 1.5 – 2 mile run as a good workout)… I don’t wash my hair (the oils are good for your hair) unless I have sweated enough for the perspiration to go through my shirt (and every three days regardless… though the sweat usually comes first – unless I don’t feel well)

  35. Haha! This reminds me of an old Ellen DeGeneres bit where she asks “Who the heck are these women who pee all over public toilets anyway?” She moves her hips around like she’s dancing and goes, “Ohhh yeah, this is juuust right!” So. Gross.

    Just ask the Myth Busters who tested the germs on toilet seats vs other places in a home (ie kitchen counters) and found that the toilet seat was one of the least covered in bacteria, squatting is unnecessary and makes a mess.

  36. I too am a sitter. I always check the seat first to see if any messy squatters have been there before me & been too lazy to be a “sweetie and wipe the seatie.” Exception is port-a-potties – they are gross and freak me out – I always hover & if I know I’m going to a fest or something I always have a little pack tissue w/me. And unless I workout I only shower every other day or so. If I do workout & my hair gets sweaty I just rinse with warm water unless it’s a “wash day” because my hair prefers to only be sudsed up 3x a week max. And obviously I don’t mind answering personal questions online =)

  37. Another sitter in the hizzouze!!! Unless, of course, a messy squatter was there before me (or someone has left a pube on the seat. gag). Porta potties are an exception b/c they freak me out.
    And I shower daily. Sometimes twice. Whhhaaat?? Yes. My hair is uber fine and thin, so if I don’t wash it daily, its a big grease mess. And I work out daily, and I stink afterwards. Also, in the summertime, there are hot days at the pool or in the yard that I need a second shower. I don’t like to go to bed smelling like BO. And maybe not everyone stinks when they sweat. But I do. And I don’t like the smell. So I like to shower. I like the smell of soap. Lush’s Fig & Leaf soap.

    • interestingly enough my hair (which is fine as well) actually looked the best the two months that I swore off shampoo and switched to using a baking soda scrub (followed by vinegar) once a week.. It looked incredibly gross at first, but after a week or so it never looked that amazing…

      • Very interesting. I don’t think I could do it. While I love all-natural things (cleaning with vinegar, using baking soda to scrub my stove, making my own laundry detergent, and so on), I am a product whore when it comes to my hair. I love to pay someone hundreds of dollars to color it and I love to buy nice smelling shampoos (that are, of course, sulfate and paraben free)

  38. I sit most of the time (unless there are no other stalls open and I really have to use one with something on the seat). I don’t have good aim if I squat, and I don’t want to subject everyone else to a mess on the seat.

    As for showering, I usually take one a day unless it’s a day I can sleep in followed by a day I have to work early and then I take one when I wake up and one before bed. My hair gets really oily as well, so I have to wash it every time I take a shower.

  39. I’m a sitter, but also a pre-flusher in case there’s any splash. Wet seats drive me crazy.

    I love showering. I’d shower 5 times a day if I thought my skin and water bill would put up with it. I shower before the gym or a run in the morning, after the gym in the morning, and often again after any evening run or workout. I only wash my hair once a day though, the other times using those shower caps that always make me feel like I’ve reverted to the 1950’s.

  40. Im a weird case, i rarely was my hands and i don’t really shower that often. But at the same time im never sick, maybe once every 3 years for 1-2 days tops. My parents did bring me up with good hygiene but i think hygiene is overrated and it weakens your immune system.