How Do You Define Healthy? [Plus: 22 “Men’s” Exercises Women Should Do]

This is how Gym Buddy Megan defines healthy. And also, this is hands-down my absolute fave picture of her ever.

Six scrambled eggs cooked in butter, a half pound of bacon, four potatoes worth of hash browns, six pieces of buttered toast, and a 32 oz. milkshake. And that’s just for breakfast. As the world watches in horror and fascination, Susanne Eman just keeps eating — literally — at her goal to become the fattest woman in history. Says Eman to The Sun, “The bigger I get, the better I feel. I feel more confident and sexy. Why shouldn’t I push the limits and see how fat I can get and stay healthy?” Her ultimate goal: 1 ton, or 1,800 pounds.

While Eman’s blood work has consistently been in the normal(ish) range, her doctor thinks she’s playing Russian roulette with her life and many are questioning how she can really consider herself healthy when she can barely walk without assistance. Eman, who eats more than 20,000 calories a day, needs her two sons, six carts and a motorized scooter to do her grocery shopping — a feat she only attempts once a month because it takes her eight hours.

One person who could understand the pains of being that heavy is Donna Simpson — earlier this year a 600-lb Simpson made headlines for being “the world’s heaviest mother” and announcing her weight goal of 1,000 pounds. But perhaps more newsworthy was the fact that she supported her increasing waistline with a fetish website where men paid to watch her eat in her underwear. She felt sexy! She felt great! But now that Simpson has broken up with her boyfriend of five years, she’s decided to drop some of the pounds. She’s not doing it because she thinks she has to be svelte to find another man. In fact, she says that she would happily ditch the diet should another “feeder” boyfriend come a-knocking. Simpson is losing weight because she simply can’t function. She cannot effectively take care of herself or her day-to-day affairs at her size.

“The health and welfare of my family was always my priority and they were well taken care of by my ex. Now that I have sole responsibility of taking care of my children, I must drastically change my lifestyle. Most people see me as a woman who became famous for wanting to gain weight while the rest of the world was trying to slim down. This was true as I was in a relationship that was based on a fetish that exists only in a fantasy.” Simpson goes on to call her relationship which was based on “feeding,” abusive.

I originally wrote this piece for iVillage but I’ll admit to still having a lot of conflicting feelings about this story. I admire both women for feeling so great in their own skin and for bucking convention. And I do think it’s possible to be perfectly healthy and still weigh more than what is currently deemed ideal. But, when your weight (either too low or too high) interferes with your ability to meet your basic needs, that’s kind of the definition of unhealthy right? Or does health not matter as long as what she’s doing makes her happy?

How do you define healthy – is it about what your numbers say or about how well you can function? Or is it something else entirely?

Other places I am this week:

Shape Magazine: Can Pinterest Change Your Life? Science says yes! And you thought it was just another fun way to procrastinate…

iVillage: Kninkles: The One Body Part Gwyneth Paltrow and I have in Common. Another day, another manufactured body “flaw” to hate on.

Redbook: Are Leashes for Kids Cruel or Kind? I once had a girl ask me in a store why I brought my puppy. It was actually my 3-year-old on a toddler leash. (He liked being on a leash about as much as a cat does.)

Shape Magazine: 22 Men’s Exercises Women Should Do – my latest slideshow – is their featured story this week as, just like many of you commented earlier this week, women are learning that we don’t need to be afraid to lift like the dudes.

Here are the outtakes from our super manly photoshoot. Dude Tip #1: Always wear your best workout skirt! (Ours are courtesy of Dirty Red Gear.)

We started out with the manliest of all lifts: the chest press. And yes, Allison really does bench 135.

 

Then we moved on to the Olympic lifts. Ok, deep breath! I can do this! I’m so ready to clean-and-jerk this baby! (Oh if I had a nickle for every time someone yelled “That’s what SHE said” during this photo shoot.) Wha…? Who took my weights?

 

 Nothing says DUDE like jazz hands and duck lips.

 

Megan takes her kettlebell workout to Broadway. Totally manly.

 

Where does a kick line rank on the testosterone meter, exactly?

 

And of course in true male fashion, we ended the workout with a group tickle fight! Who’s got pillows, girls?!

 

This pose was literally ripped from the pages of my childhood photo album: Ballet Recital 1982. All we’re missing is my Little Orphan Annie wig and some garish makeup.

To see the actual weight-lifting moves and to read my hilarious instructions on how to master them, check out the slideshow on Shape.com!

21 Comments

  1. I love gym buddies!

  2. There is SOOOOO much more to health than numbers. Someone can be a perfectly healthy weight and have perfect blood work numbers but be mentally unhealthy or be in abusive relationships or feel empty spiritually. So yeah…I think “health” is much more complex than numbers and the lady who wanted to be the fattest woman in the world has a lot more “health” concerns than just weight and being able to move around.

    On another note…I miss you!!! I haven’t been reading blogs much lately but I plan to catch up over the weekend. Esp. on yours! Been super busy getting our rv ready and I finally started my fashion feature on New School Nomads. xo

  3. These women are not healthy – both mentally and physically. If you cannot/or barely walk, need help with simple chores and put your own “feeding” before the well being of your kids – then you are not healthy. But I think the examples you chose are extreme and of course there are people who are (slightly) overweight and healthy and slim people that are not healthy.
    These two women are addicted to food – and they are saying they are ok. Don’t all addicts do that before admitting they have a problem? Food can be a drug, just like alcohol or other drugs. To be honest it worries me that someone would question if they are healthy or not.

    That being healthy is more then a set of numbers I agree. For one – I think mental health is a big part in being/feeling healthy (you spoke of depression yesterday), and that is something that can’t be measured in numbers like your weight or blood work. But I also don’t think that people are healthy if they say they are – people lie to themselves every day and sometimes they need to be ‘called out’ by someone that cares about them for their behavior that is doing them harm: be it smoking, drinking, eating too much/unhealthy/little, not exercising/moving or even things like being in an abusive relationship. At the end of the day you need to help yourself and change your ways but standing by while someone you care about harms themselves is not ok.

  4. LOOOVE THE SHAPE SLIDESHOW.

    SAD that it still needs the LIFT LIKE A DUDE to get us women to click.

  5. Agree that people can be healthy at higher weights than the actual “healthy” range, or definitely higher than society’s ideal body. There are even studies that show that slightly overweight people live longer than healthy-weight and underweight people.

    The key word there is slightly. When they say slightly, they’re talking closer to 180 than 1,800. Weight ten times that slightly overweight designation is NOT healthy. Barely being able to walk (much less exercise) is NOT healthy. Meals high in cholesterol and saturated fat (and, likely, trans fats) and low in veggies, fruits and whole grains are NOT healthy. All the studies showing that slightly overweight people were just as healthy or healthier than “healthy-weight” or underweight people looked at slightly overweight people who were eating healthy, balanced meals (at least most of the time) and working out, at least moderately. This woman is doing neither.

    And, personally, I think the girl who described her former “feeder” relationship as abusive is probably, sadly, right on. Guys who have a fetish about feeding a woman to the point that she’s so big she can’t take care of herself (and who act on it, I should add) are essentially wanting to make a girl so big that she can’t leave the house without his assistance, can’t go out with friends without him, can’t go to work outside the home, can’t do much of anything without him. He’s trying to get the girl to the point where she can’t function without him. That should be a GIANT red flag, whether he’s doing it by making sure she’s too fat to walk or doing it by becoming jealous and isolating her from her friends and family, etc.

  6. By no means do you have to be a skinny mini, but if you can’t get around or function on your own, you aren’t healthy.

    And by the way…love the slideshow of manly exercises women should do! Push ups are definitely another one that women always say they can’t do but SHOULD!

  7. Dude, kninkles? Really? This is what we have come to now? Just wow.

  8. I know they said headbands are back in, but I think you took it a bit too far. “Damn it feels good to be a gangsta.”

  9. I absolutely love that pic of Megan – does she know you spread it all over the world through the internet? lol.

    Regarding the “what is healthy discussion”: Sometimes when I hear people say “I feel good the way I am.” I am not sure if they really mean it. In my opinion there is no way to really feel good once you exceed a certain limit. To me it seems more like a self-defense reaction or something like that.

    To me “healthy” shouldn’t be defined by looks though. When you are able to walk up the stairs without getting a heart attack, when you can play outside with your children without needing an h2o mask, when all your vital signs are fine and you feel good THEN you’re healthy!

  10. Gym Buddies rule!!!!!

    As for the two women you write about here, no, they’re not healthy. If they were striving to be thinner and thinner and thinner we’d call them anorexic (and we’d be right). Anytime we are a slave to our weight or appearance, we are not healthy. The same holds true for compulsive shoppers, who are endlessly looking for that pair of jeans or shoes or the dress that will make them “perfect.” Or people who get one cosmetic surgery procedure after another after another. When we rely on the opinions of people we don’t know to decide our worth, something is wrong.
    Both women have said they are unable to function: they rely on boyfriends or their kids to get around. It’s not fair to the women themselves, and it’s absolutely not fair to the kids. What happens when they want to go away to school, or simply move out and have their own lives?
    When I first moved to L.A. I saw a woman who was so skinny she literally couldn’t walk by herself. Her boyfriend had to help her cross the street. This, IMO, is the other side of the same coin.
    I agree that health comes in a whole slew of different sizes. But when a person cannot function solely due to their weight (on either end of the scale), something has to change.

  11. I think that people can be healthy at overweight, or even the lighter stages of obese, but by gaining that much weight, you’re putting your organs and bones under tremendous strain, even if the numbers don’t reflect it!

    I love the slideshow! Some of those moves look hardcore – the turkish get-up will be the death of me!

    (Also, this is just me being picky, but the Sun is the dodgiest source out there, and it’s famous for making up quite a few of it’s news stories, the ‘famous’ one being ‘Freddie Starr ate my hamster’ about a UK comedian in the 90’s. Never happened, but they ran the story for about a week! While I have no doubt that this woman is that big, and intending to gain the weight, the Sun will have manipulated her quotes a bit. Its infamous for writing ‘Gotcha!’ about the death of 300 Argentinians, and making up stories about football fans urinating on the dead during in the biggest stadium disaster in UK history. Sorry if that’s a bit long winded, I’m just not a fan of the Sun!)

  12. I agree that health comes in many shapes and sizes.

    the only problem i have with those women is when they wake up(well..one has…kinda) and decide they need surgery or help or whatever…who will pay for it? and who is paying for all that food the first woman buys each month? welfare?

  13. That mother who was trying to get to 1000 is very disturbing to me. I think being physically healthy is keeping a good workout schedule, eating well to the best of your ability and letting your body relax when needed. I fall short on the relaxation part. 😛

  14. Interesting question! Being a doctor, I think I do a better job at identifying unhealthy. The field provides the definitions for that!.

  15. Complex question! I think people can be “overweight” & still be healthy. In fact, they can look great but our society would say they are fat. If you can do the things every day that need to be done & NOT need extra space or an extra this or that to function AND your health numbers are good, well, that may be fine. When you get to obese & super obese, I do think it is playing with fire AND you may need special accommodations beyond what is already out there AND if you have kids, I just don’t think that is healthy for them as you lead them to an unhealthy life long term… along with how others may treat the kid & not fare to them.

    ON your pics – you guys – I LOVE! Got to go over & see the non outtakes!

  16. PS: Great exercises over at Shape!

  17. A kick line ranks SO HIGH on the testosterone meter,
    it ceases to register!

    The menz just *wish* they could kick that high!

  18. I think, at least for me, health is defined by acceptable numbers (heart rate, blood pressure, etc) and feeling great mentally and emotionally. It all needs to be there for me to truly consider myself healthy. Thankfully, I’m in a healthy place right now, all around.

  19. This is an issue for me, because I’ve been overweight my whole life. I exercise and eat fairly healthy (certainly better than many others, including some “skinny” people I know), but I am far from perfect. That being said, I have good numbers and don’t have any issues. I struggle to stay overweight and not slip into the slightly obese category, and I find it very discouraging when people don’t bother to see that overweight people can be making good decisions and still be overweight. It doesn’t mean I’m sitting eating bon-bons and forgoing exercise – if that was the case, trust me – I’d be obese and not simply 20 pounds above my goal.

    Additionally, I have worked with a professional trainer and I’ve had my lean mass tested. To be at a socially or even BMI acceptable weight, I would have to maintain a body fat percentage of less than 20%, which, given my body shape and lifestyle (sorry, I’m not going to eat kale for breakfast lunch and dinner for the next 80 years) is virtually unobtainable and I would be miserable. I’m aiming for 25% body fat eventually. Higher than some would say is good, but still decent for an average mom at 30.

  20. At 65, I’m just so damned glad my knees carry me back and forth to the gym and the pool…they can be as “kninkley” as they want!!

  21. Pingback:Your Questions About Youtube Exercises To Lose Belly Fat | Belly Fat Exercises For Women