Doing Things I’m Totally Unqualified For [Plus: How To Find A Gym Buddy of Your Very Own]

Think fast: It’s two minutes until your favorite group fitness class is supposed to start, the room is packed with people ready to get their sweat on and all of a sudden you get the message: the teacher – a rockstar so beloved that people routinely drive a half hour past other perfectly decent gyms to take her classes – has been struck down with an intestinal bug and isn’t coming. Your options are to duck out and run for one of the treadmills before they’re all taken, try out the Active Older Adult class or throw the sweat towel in early and head out for brunch. Or… you could jump in and help. Gym Buddy to the rescue! Which is how this happened on Saturday:

Totally made the whole thing up as I went along...

Yeah, so how was your weekend? Mine was awesome – I got to live out the dream I’ve never had of becoming an aerobics instructor when Turbo Jennie was slammed with food poisoning (hint: never eat at a restaurant with the word “Green” already built in the title…). There was some confusion as we all scrambled trying to figure out what to do after receiving the news but we all knew we still wanted our TurboKick. Someone found some old music and somehow I got my hands on the mic. (I know – I can’t believe they just gave it to me either! Had I ever taught aerobics before? Well, it can’t be that different from High School Chemistry, right?


Lucky for you Gym Buddy Allison got video of my good-deed-gone-awry. “Punch, punch and Jump! To! The! Front!” There’s a reason this is not my day job. No, the best part of this was not that I got to relive my community theater days – although I did have a blast, not gonna lie – it was how a whole room of Gym Buddies pulled together to make Gatorade from gators. (Wow, that’s a gruesome analogy – am sticking with the proverbial lemon next time.) Seeing as I had never done that particular round before (I think it came out before I was born) and couldn’t make any sense out of the notes (for the love of little green apples, what is a “scissor”?!), it ended up being an exercise in group improv. “Okay!” I’d shout in my best cheerleader-chirp, “Everyone four punches to the front!”

“And then WHEEL!” Lindsey would shout out and we’d all wheel.

“Do a Capoeria!!” Allison would add on and we’d all bust one out. (Convenient since this last week we’ve been doing a Capoeira workout for this month’s Experiment and it has been MAD fun!)

And then I’d turn to Megan and ask her to repeat the whole sequence back to me because apparently attaching a mic pack to my head short-circuits my short-term memory.

We did the entire hour workout complete with legs and abs (during which I yelled at them to quit resting just like Jennie does!) and almost everyone stuck it out! I’m not sure how great of a workout it was for everyone else – I was drenched in sweat; it’s crazy hard to talk and Turbo! – but everyone just did the best with what we had and if nothing else we all burned a lot of calories just from the laughing. I tried to help Jennie, the whole class helped me and in the end everyone won. That’s the power of good Gym Buddies.

It’s no secret that the “secret” behind The Great Fitness Experiment are my Gym Buddies. These girls (and the occasional dude) keep me sane, make me laugh every day, fix errant bra straps, provide spare ponytail holders, tell me when I have camel toe (we tried to make up a hand sign for that one but everything we came up with was more obscene than what we were trying to prevent!), catch me when I get my feet caught in the TRX, compete against me in everything we do, listen to my long-winded stories and through it all never complain about all the crazy stuff I drag them into. (I am a risky friend – how often do your girlfriends talk you into getting your head locked between a strange man’s legs? Don’t answer that.) One of the questions I get most often is how did I find these girls and how can you find your own Gym Buddies?

1. Look for a Gym Buddy in the gym. (Or wherever it is you workout.)Β Β I know it sounds obvious but I can’t tell you how many e-mails/comments I’ve got from people saying how they keep trying to get their neighbor/best friend/cousin/coworker/spouse to exercise with them but it doesn’t work out. Either they’re not as committed to getting up at 5 a.m. or they are slower runners or passive-aggressive chewers or whatever. So look around your gym for people who are already doing the same things you are doing. Who are the girls you regularly see in your classes? Who are the men lifting weights the same time as you? Some gyms even have bulletin boards where you can post a note looking for a running group or weight lifting partner. Plus meeting someone at your current gym automatically fixes the transportation, meeting place, cost and other issues.

2. Be friendly. This part is hard for a lot of us. Believe it or not, I’m not a naturally outgoing person. I spent the first half of my life telling people I was painfully shy until one day I decided that I was sick of that label and sick of being “shy.” Striking up that first conversation with a stranger isn’t easy, even for those of us that make it look easy. But it does get better! The more times you smile at someone in the mirror or give them a sweaty high five after class, the more natural it gets. Not everyone is going to respond – some people just prefer to workout alone and that’s cool – so this would be a good time to break out those dealing-with-rejection skills.

3. Look for people like you. Whether or not you are in the gym, often you will meet people who share similar interests. Of course you won’t know they share your passion for Piloxing or your yen for zen unless you are doing #2. (Hahah – I wrote “doing number two!” I’m sorry, I live with 4 people under 8. I can’t help it.) I’ve found great Gym Buddies at church, the PTA, playgroups and even in line at Target. Don’t forget the Internet – check out forums for whatever sport you love and see if you can find a local group to join.

4. Don’t be afraid to seal the deal. When you meet someone you think might be a good workout partner, don’t be shy about setting a time and place. You’re not asking them to marry you, you’re just asking them to stare at your scantily clad butt as you sweat a puddle that smells like the curry you had for dinner the night before while you do Hot Yoga together. See? Easy.

Do you have a good Gym Buddy or three? What are your tips for finding a good Gym Buddy? Have you ever had to do something you’re totally unqualified for (birth a baby? land an airplane? roll a whale back into the sea?)??

45 Comments

  1. Remember the last time you posted about forgetting a hair tie? I forgot one the very next day. I’m mentally preparing myself to not have one tomorrow at the gym.

    I love that you grabbed the mic, and you sound like a natural. I’d never peg you as the shy one, but I had to work at it too. I am not naturally outgoing, but part of having 4 brothers and sisters is that you have to speak up if you want to be heard. That motto has served me well.

    • First, I need to know if you forgot your hair tie! And then tell me why you are commenting at 2 a.m. young lady?! πŸ˜‰

  2. Have you ever had to do something you’re totally unqualified for? YES! When I was working for a school in South Africa last year, one of the teachers didn’t turn up for the kids’ second to last class before exams, so I had to teach 40 kids Literature from a text book written entirely in Xhosa. Xhosa is one of the languages with several clicks, and is also a tonal language, so intonation is everything. My Xhosa is limited to about 10 phrases. It went ‘okay’ – I ended up getting the kids to read one of the stories out loud, then the class had to explain the plot, characters, language devices etc to me in english. I then had one of them translate the questions for me, and we answered them based on a voting system – we’d listen to two or three of the kids’ answers for the question (written in English for my benefit) and vote on which one we (as a class) thought was right. It was the longest 2 hours of my life!

    • Oh wow – that must have been scary but what a great thing you did! That’s amazing!! You are my new hero.

  3. I dont have a gym buddy. This sounds awful but I just love the SOLITUDE that my workouts give me…I dont want to chat or worry that someone thinks Im going to fast, not working hard enough, etc etc…I just use my workout time to be totally about ME and thinking about managing someone else’s emotions, workout, etc..well, that’s why I dont have a gym buddy. I am so over connected with social media, blog, work, kid, husband…I like the break. All half hour of it. lol

    Im sure I sound like a beeotch or antisocial. Promise, I’m not. Love that you have your buddies b/c for you, they work! yay for that!

    • Oh yes, some people love working out in groups while others are like you and just need some alone time! Either way works as long as you are taking care of your needs!

  4. Is the sense of POWER now rushing to your head so that you can’t wait to do it again?! It was like that when I got pressed into service as boot-camp leader. Terrifying at first, but then you can’t get enough of it!

    I love my gym buddies, too. Got several who are usually up for a challenge (“Lookie what I can do! Can you do this, huh, huh?!”)

    • Hahah – not really. I’m guessing it broke a ton of rules too so I doubt the opportunity will come my way again. Cool about your boot camp class – I bet you were fab!

  5. This is totally awesome! I think I’m most impressed with how full the room is. That a group that large just let you grab the mic and lead them. Now that’s dedication and teamwork! Looks like you did a great job.

    My husband and I run together in the morning. But I do the rest of my working out alone, as I do it all at home. No gym for me.

    I have helped teach pre-k before, when my daughter was that age. Her teacher had to be at a funeral and so her assistant agreed to teach if a couple of us parents assisted. You’d think that wouldn’t be such a hard job, but then consider a room with 20 4 year olds in it and think about it again. πŸ˜‰

    • I know! I can’t believe they mostly all stayed either! Totally made me laugh. And this; ” a room with 20 4 year olds in it” is my WORST NIGHTMARE. Kudos to you for helping out.

  6. I would have gone for brunch. But good on you for jumping in. You did great; just like the old saying, “Fake it ’til you make it.”

  7. I bet you did great!

    My gym buddy is Jason I suppose — we usually go at the same time. I want to get my sister Kim to join me more often — especially after the marathon in June because I’ve decided to do Female Body Breakthrough and I do not want to do that warmup alone! πŸ™‚

    • Oh girl, find you a good gym buddy because that workout should never be done alone unless you have a may pole and a pinafore!

  8. Great post! I USUALLY don’t like working out with a partner….unless I need a spot. Haha. Then I’m ALL ABOUT partners. I just really like being able to 100% focus on lifting while I’m doing it, taking rests that are my preference in length, and have that solidarity with myself and that strong mind-muscle connection. BUT even though I’m very set in my ways, when people ask me to work out with them I’m never ever rude about saying no, and I am always friendly to them afterwards — there’s really nothing to be afraid of for those of you who are doing the asking! πŸ™‚

    • “…unless I need a spot” I should hope so! πŸ˜‰ And you’re right 99% of people will be super nice and polite about it even if they’re not interested.

  9. You did a fabulous job!! You kick super high, too! πŸ™‚ Go you!! Sometimes I think that when I hit my goal weight, I may go get qualified as a Zumba instructor. The only problem is that I am not sure I can do the routine facing the group (at my gym, we all mirror the instructor). But, we’ll see.

    And as for doing things I’m not qualified to do? Um, all the time. I like to think of myself as someone who is qualified to give an opinion on everything! πŸ˜‰ I’m extremely outgoing so unless I’m certain I don’t know what I’m doing, I’m usually okay to give just about anything a go once! πŸ™‚

    • You should do the Zumba training!! Zumba is SO FUN! And I bet you’ll get the mirroring part down really quick once you get used to it. Why wait until you your goal weight though? Do it now, girl!

  10. Awesome job!!!!!! I bet everyone had a great time! And, yeah, you’re a natural!

    I’m lucky in that I have a WHOLE BUNCH of gym buddies: my clients. I always do Pilates with a number of people, and we often chat, gossip, and they even laugh at my lame jokes. When I work out at I home I have my mini-trainers with me: My kids like to sit on my back/stomach and run in circles around me when I do my workout DVDs. (Makes the kickboxing ones a bit tricky, lol!)

    OK, now for my “42nd Street” moment (“You’re goin’ out there a chorus girl, but you’ve gotta come back a star!”): in college I was OBSESSED with “The Rocky Horror Picture Show.” I would go almost every weekend, dress up, bring props, etc. I had some friends who were in the live floor show, and I wanted to be in it more than anything. Eventually the director agreed to take me on as an understudy and, yes, the night came when I was told, right before the show, that I was going on. It was SO MUCH FUN, and I ended up staying with the show for another 18 months. My mom even came to see it once. And yelled “Slut!” at me with the rest of the audience, repeatedly.
    Ah, good times!

  11. You did a great job!!

    I’ve found a few buddies at the rock gym, but it’s easier there because you just need to ask, “Would you like me to belay you?” And then you’re golden.

    My other training buddy I found by conning her into doing triathlons with me. πŸ™‚

  12. JourneyBeyondSurvival

    IN THE GYM!?!?!

    *oh*

    I think I figured out my problem. πŸ˜‰

  13. Charlotte, I would totally pay money to have been at that class! I’m betting it was fun, a good workout, and just a total riot. And that video made me miss Turbokick!

    Not having anyone to workout with was part of the reason I dropped my gym membership in favor of working out at home though. In college I had gym buddies and it’s just not the same without ’em. Kudos to you for getting over the shy-ness! I don’t know that I’ll ever have the nerve to talk to someone I don’t know in the gym.

    • I know – I really miss my College girls too! There’s something really special about friendships made then!

  14. I’m probably unqualified for a lot of what I do, but I’m in the “fake it ’til you make it camp.” One of the hardest things for me was jumping in to instruct a horseback riding session when I didn’t know the riders or volunteers very well. I was qualified to teach the lesson itself, but organizing people and getting them to do what you’re asking them to when they don’t know you is difficult sometimes. Especially when it comes to the older particiapnts who have a hard time seeing someone younger as an authoritative figure!

    Like you, I used to be shy but decided I really enjoy talking to people. It’s still hard for me to start a conversation with someone I don’t know, but I usually don’t have trouble once someone else starts.

    By the way, I finally picked up your book on Friday and started reading it today. I was even lucky enough to get an autographed copied from Barnes & Noble! The best part of the trip, though, was the random yellow post it note attached to a shelf in the “Diet” section that said “You’re Perfect!”

    • Wait, they put my book in the diet section?? #Fail! But that is super cool about the note! And thankyouthankyouthankyou for buying my book! You have no idea how much that means to me! And kudos on jumping in with the horseback lessons.

      • Oops, looks like I wasn’t clear. Your book was in the Fitness section; the diet section was in the same aisle, so I spotted it when looking for your book. Barnes and Noble did it right!

  15. I think my entire first full year of mommahood I did things I didn’t feel qualified to do. πŸ™‚

    Although I have a dear gym buddy, she’s about to switch from working weekends only to mon-fri again and I’m going to have to make friends. I’ve been trying to talk friends into working it with me, but nobody wants to. Not even my friend who taught step and spin for years. It really struck me about making friends with the folks who are already at the gym. I guess I’m going to have to be a bit more social.

    And the clip looks awesome. I’d take your class :).

    • Oooh “I think my entire first full year of mommahood I did things I didn’t feel qualified to do.” SO TRUE!!!

  16. I love this post! I would absolutely take your class. I like some laughs in my workouts. THanks for the gym-buddy tips. I’ve never had a gym buddy before. I’m not going to put the tips into practice ust yet, since I’m momving, but I’m going to look for gym buddies after I move!

    Charlotte, I love your blog…but I seem to be having some problems on it lately. I realized that I haven’t been on as often lately, because of these issues, but then I though that that wasn’t fair to myself OR to you. Anyway…it’s really slow to load up and scroll. There’s also a delay when I’m trying to type up comments (letters show up well after I’ve typed them and the cursor doesn’t line up with where I’m typing). Is this just a “me ” problem, or are other people finding the same things?

    • I hope you find some good Gym Buddies where you move to! As for the site issues, I e-mailed you some suggestions but if they don’t help please let me know!

  17. YOU ROCK and your gym buddies!!! Love it! I am a solo workout person & always have been – like it that way – but ya never know. I do see the same people at my time but we all do our own thing! πŸ™‚

    YES, I have had to something I am not qualified for – I prefer to forget about those times! πŸ˜‰

    I thought I would mention that the new website is still slow to me & kind of jerky when you scroll up & down. Not sure if others are having similar issues…. love the look though!

  18. I REALLY want gym buddies like yours, but it’s tough to do when I’m at different hotel gyms all the time πŸ™ In good news, I think I am going to be planning a trip to Minneapolis this summer to go camping, and I totally want to come crash one of your classes and meet your gym buddies!

  19. TurboFabulous! It is so great to have a support system (like the gym buddies) who encourage and support you when you try something new.

    When my hubby and I were dating I spent a lot of time studying with him at the law school library, so much so that people thought I was a law school student. I wish I would have had the guts to play it off, but I fessed up every time someone asked me.

    • Hey, honesty is a virtue! Esp. in the law! I have a friend who met her husband in teh law library… and neither of them were law students!

  20. Off-topic, entirely, but I <3 your blue workout top!!

    and I'm not a gym person (except for the rock climbing place near me which I haven't frequented in awhile) – but I do miss the camaraderie I experienced when I was a gym goer

    • Super cute, right? It’s from fit couture but the black part at the top is another sports bra that I had to layer underneath it as the top itself was a little too boob-tastic for my comfort level. I love the “strappy” look though!

  21. Looks like you did a great job leading the class! Congrats πŸ™‚

  22. I am so proud of you for stepping up to that big plate and taking charge!!! What a great job!! Tomorrow night in class I’m going to yell JUMP! TO! THE! FRONT! and see what happens!!! You are the ultimate gym buddy!!

    Love you, Turbo Jennie

  23. That’s so coo! I would never guess you were shy!

    I really dislike working out with other people. I workout with my husband pretty regularly but even then we don’t chat it up much. Working out is my time to think, dream, and get connected to myself or to God.