Fitness Fashion Over the Past Century [Pics! Plus one really unfortunate one.]

Is this a good idea? I can’t decide. On one hand, it would cut down on the sweat running down my neck. But even if it is Lululemon, is that worth it to look like you’ve been attacked by a very aggressive ferret? Or by one of those ladies that sell those weird hairpieces in the mall that – admit it – you’ve always wanted to try?

I’m a girly girl. I have a thing for clothing in general but I have two loves: vintage frocks and workout clothing. So the two together? Sartorial heaven! Whether you love the clothes like I do or whether you just need ideas for your next costume party, I’ve compiled a guide for you. Why? Because it amuses me in a way that only people who have bought a snuggie off TV can truly understand.

Charlotte’s Decade-by-Decade Guide to Workout Wear

The 30’s brought us this marvelous contraption that I believe is supposed to shake the fat off you – a practice still in vogue forty years later as evidenced by picture above and the fact that my grandma actually wrote about doing this in her journal. Plus – KNICKERS. And swim caps. And collars on swim suits. Love.

Heading back to the 40’s, we get not only awesome beachwear but girl fights! Don’t you love how “scared” the girl in the middle is? I love their not-a-hair-out-of-place rolled coif.

Nothing says fitness competitor like this shot of Marilyn Monroe in the ’50s. Not only is she pressing like 20 whole pounds but she also has her sexyface going on. Don’t forget, all you lady lifters – the tip toes make this a compound exercise! Bonus: high waisted shorts + pointy bra = best lifting outfit evah! No seriously, I’m not mocking. I would totally wear this.

Nothing says “A-Train to Harlem” like this vintage 60’s tracksuit, complete with Jackie Chan tee that probably eBays for $500 now. (Edited to add: apparently I don’t know my 70’s kung-fu stars. Apparently this is Bruce Lee. Who knew??) Actually, now that I think about it, this whole outfit seems to be pretty trendy right now. Or maybe it just never went out of style. Darn men and their practicality! Although the stirrup pants might be just a wee bit over the top. But don’t let that hold you back.

This 1972 ad for “Sear’s Beauty Spa” (yes, Sears, as in the department store) made my whole darn day. They’re exercising while reclining! And getting jiggled! And all while wearing polyester ADULT FOOTIE PAJAMAS! This is why I blog at 10 o’clock at night, folks. I would pay good money to see this kind of personal training in action.

Ah, Olivia Newton John – how do I love thee? Only you can work Valentine’s day spandex and a fem-mullet with such class! Plus the posing! I will practice every night in the mirror until I have perfected hamstring stretch/salute to Fame pose.

The 70’s & 80’s were pretty much dominated by one shiny, thong-wearing, how-on-earth-did-she-pee-with-tights-on woman: Jane Fonda. Look at all the awesomeness going on in this picture – belts! suspenders! purple leopard print! mock turtlenecks! halfsie zippers! scrunched matchy-matchy socks! baby dumbbells! And the fizz in this bag of pop rocks? THE HAIR.

This shot from the 80’s demonstrates perfectly all the problems with leggings for men (meggings?). But when said leggings come as part of a suspendered unitard with stirrup bottoms (not to mention the sewn-in shirt)? Bring on the hotness! Please, please, please let someone wear this to my Y someday.

The 90’s brought us many things – grunge, My So-Called Life, Daria, riot grrls, my high school experience (was everything in the 90’s depressing?) – but my favorite innovation was black athletic shoes. Oh sure other decades might have snuck them in here and there but the 90’s was when gyms finally had to get serious and post those “No black-soled shoes on the gym floor” signs all over. I still have a soft spot for black tennies, even though they make my legs look like I wax with reflective tape.

What is the hallmark workout item of the aughts? (The 2000’s? The double 00s??) I can’t honestly say yet, being too close still but I sincerely hope it’s the workout skirt. I own nearly every variety now – skirtcapris, running, yoga, compression, patterned, tennis and even tutus – and yet I am always on the lookout for another. How much do I want this Lululemon pace skirt? Heck yes I want to run a race with a be-ruffled rear!! Cobalt blue butt please.

Last but not least, no discussion of workout clothing would be complete without the obligatory humiliation shot. I have no words except that some designer somewhere must have really hated this team.

Hoodie with ponytail cutout- cool or crazy? What do you think will define workout fashion from this last decade? Do you have any awesome/embarrassing retro workout clothes in your closet? (If they need a new home and you send them to me, I promise I will wear them!)

Written with love by Charlotte Hilton Andersen for The Great Fitness Experiment (c) 2011. If you enjoyed this, please check out my new book The Great Fitness Experiment: One Year of Trying Everythingfor more of my crazy antics and uncomfortable over-shares!