Wonder Woman, sometime paramour of Superman with her bullet shaped bras (Superman has a fetish?) and athletic legs, has long been considered a heroine in her own right by millions of fans – girls and boys alike. But is she a good role model?
When my second son insisted on checking out a Justice League book from the library with she of the Barbie waist and wedgie-defying leotard on the cover, I cringed. Surely this was not appropriate fare for a young developing mind. At the very least it would teach him that DDD breasts are self supporting and GoGo boots are the footwear of choice when fighting crime – both concepts that would make a real-life woman laugh hysterically before remembering with both chagrin and nostalgia the little girl she used to be who was Wonder Woman four years in a row for Halloween. (Not that I’ll ever admit to it. Or to the red, white and blue swimsuit with tin foil armbands that has grown musty with age but still has a place of honor in my memory box.)
My second son being the stubborn child he is, he made his case (loudly) and I acquiesced (quietly) and the book came home with us. That night during bedtime stories, I discovered that the first page has Wonder Woman’s vital stats – because of course we judge even our Superheroines by their bust-waist-hip. But before I could roll my eyes a second time, I was first surprised and then impressed to note that Wonder Woman is (are you ready for this?):
Besides being surprised that Wonder Woman is not her actual name (next thing you’ll tell me He-Man is really Dexter) and that one can be an ambassador with a cloth-to-flesh ratio that would embarrass a street walker, I was impressed to note that her animators had actually given her a very realistic weight for her height. This gives her a BMI of 21, solidly in the “normal” range. (Note: BMI charts are totally fine for comparing cartoons. Just don’t attempt using them on yourself. Unless you’re Jessica Rabbit, you minx, you.) When you think about it, it makes sense – she certainly gets plenty of butt-kicking exercise and you never see her eating junk food. Not bad for a 69-year-old!
The other Superheroines also followed suit: “Oracle” is 5 ft. 6 in. and 126 lbs. “Queen Bee” is 5 ft 9 in and an impressive 226 lbs! Hellloooo Queen Latifa! The only ridiculousness is “Sorceress” who is “tall as a willow” and “light as a feather.” Of course, she was invented in 2000 and bears more than a passing resemblance to Linda Evangelista.
It seems like Wonder Woman, fake as she is, at least has a good self-image. I’m not saying she’s perfect but at least she has some serious muscles. Ever seen a Bratzz doll? Skinnyplasticfat. Now if she would just lose the implants and the boots, she might regain a place in my heart. Okay, she can keep the boots – I’ve been known to wear some impractical footwear myself.
What superhero was your favorite growing up? Was anyone else convinced they had a superpower (I was 100% positive I was telepathic because I always knew what my best friend was thinking – she was thinking that she was telepathic because she always knew what I was thinking!)?