Nothing Says Fun Like Getting Punched in the Face

Scientists may have had other ideas but I think the Internet was invented for the express purpose of circulating cultural memes. (Incidentally, that’s pronounced “meem” not “me-me” like I’ve been saying for years. You’re welcome; it is my calling in life to be a cautionary tale to others.) This is great when it comes to things like the Surprise Kitty:

Oh I know you’ve all seen it. But I can’t help it – I lurve this kitteh! It makes me smile every.single.time.

Between all the fun shenanigans of “literal videos” and sharks with people teeth and Twilight Rifftrax (SO hilarious!), I sometimes forget all about the dark side. And then something like this comes around to remind me:


This clip, taken from Jersey Shore, some MTV reality show that I’ve never seen (not that I’m going to be all high and mighty about that because we both know if it were on during my a.m. treadmill time I’d totally watch it), shows a girl named Nicole Polizzi a.k.a. Snookie taking a closed-fist punch to the face from a man. The details are predictable, as MTV explains:

Polizzi, who suffered bruises and swelling as a result of the punch, said the clip is hard for her to watch, but that she’s glad MTV is including it in the series.

“It should be out there. Everyone should know that it can happen,” Polizzi told The News. “But also, a positive came out of it. It brought [the cast] closer together.”

Polizzi says the man who hit her was drunk and had been bothering her and her friends at the bar. When she spoke up to ask him to leave, he hit her.

Another day, just another example of people being stupid, right? What bothers me about the clip – besides the obvious violence – is the reaction of people on the Internet. This clip spread like wildfire not out of moral outrage but rather from entertainment. People think this is funny.

Comments on various sites range from blaming her for being an annoying “guidette” (the female version of a guido, I’m assuming) to laughing at the way her head snaps back to a more chilling general hatred of women in general. One commenter named Cletus Van Damme (martial arts for rednecks?) writes:

Well chicks want equal everything so here ya go Snookie. Equal being what it is when dudes talk a bunch of sh- they have to back it up or get knocked the f- out. Welcome to being equal Snookie. I’m guessing I won’t see you lined up to collect combat pay anytime soon.

But while Mr. Cletus is no gentleman, he certainly wasn’t the worst. In a weird twist, the men over at bodybuilding.com – a site that although heavy on the crap supplement ads has many great workouts, several that I’ve featured on this site – seem to have a particular love for this clip. ‘Roid rage, perhaps? To a one, they all conclude that not only did Snookie deserve it and it was hilarious but also that they would still bang her and she should thank them for the privilege. Then the thread degenerates into a discussion of her imagined sexual proclivities.

It frightens me that this kind of thinking even exists much less gets written in a public forum. Violence has become one more currency in the world of entertainment and I find it chilling that it is taken so lightly. Consider all the appropriate uproar a few months ago over Chris Brown’s beatdown of Rihanna. But what has happened since then? Chris Brown and his ridiculous bow-tie went on Larry King Live and stumbled through a confused apology – pretty much what I would expect from a celeb in his situation – but Rihanna has come out with a new single. Go girlfriend! Show the man he can’t keep you down! Show the world that you’re strong and resilient and you’re not going to take any crap from a man! Oh wait, her new song “Russian Roulette” is about how she gets talked into holding a loaded gun to her head and pulling the trigger by a man she’s in love with. Part of the lyrics say:

As my life flashes before my eyes
I’m wondering will I ever see another sunrise?
So many won’t get the chance to say goodbye
But it’s too late to think of the value of my life

I’m terrified but I’m not leaving
Know that I must pass this test
So just go on and pull the trigger

Um, excuse me?! It’s too late to think of the value of your life? As long as you are still alive it is never too late! Especially when you are the one holding the gun to your own head! Not to mention she appears on the cover naked and tied up with barbed wire. I don’t want to judge her but glamorizing violence against women hardly seems appropriate.

Set me straight: is watching Snookie get cold cocked funny? Is there any context in which that would be called for? Am I missing the subtle subtext of Rihanna’s new song? And what is with sexualizing violence against women?

29 Comments

  1. LOL it was fun.

    Some say she deserved it but she is still somewhat of a woman.

    Not very ladylike but still…

  2. Wow! What an interesting post (and the kitten video? Has now travelled to some serious friends).

    So… I agree with most, but about the rhianna song… For me, I think her song is about how when you're in the depths of a bad relationship, you really can't see out of it. It's all consuming and dangerous, better or worse.

    I think the fact that she's honest about it, about how awful such relationships can be, is a statement of strength in itself. It shows she's moved on to the point where she can look back and acknowledge just how unhealthy and negative the relationship was. …and hopefully, never go there again 😉

  3. There are some people in the world that you imagine need a life lesson. For some people, the only thing that will make them stop for even a second is something like being punched in the face. You hope their thoughts go something like, "Oh my god! Why would he do that!? Nobody has ever hit me! I was just… being…completely…obnoxious…" but of course this is extremely unlikely.

    A lot of people are unwilling to be the person to provide that lesson, but are glad when someone else does.

    That's one part of it. If this was a calm, rational guy hitting another drunk, obnoxious guy then i think most people would be "ok" with it, and find it funny. (See the various videos out there of drunken yobs picking fights with people who just floor them – EG. MMA fighters out for the night in drag)

    Flip the roles and, again, most people would be fine with this story. That's my standard test for sexism/equality. To me that just isn't an issue here – either both situations should bother you, or neither.

    The violence thing – It bothers me. In this case is was probably wasn't called for (I don't know anything about the specifics). On the other hand I really do think that there are some people who need a sharp dose of reality, and sometimes that involves getting punched in the face.

  4. It's okay for a guy to hit another guy or for a girl to hit another girl or even for a girl to hit a guy.

    But if a guy hits a girl…

    Violence is such a double standard that needs to be changed. Had Rhianna "stood up" to Chris Brown and given him a black eye, she would be applauded. Nobody should be hitting anyone — what? Are we in third grade on the playground?

    As far as the video goes, I haven't even heard of the show let alone seen the episode, but I imagine they edited out parts of the story. Sure, the guy was drunk but in my experience, drunk guys don't tend to randomly punch girls in the face. I'm not saying she was asking for it, but maybe she should look at her own actions and what she may have done to provoke the situation.

  5. We just had an incident in Central Florida where a woman was arrested for hitting her boyfriend in the face with a raw steak! The "cause" was he wanted a piece of bread?? Probably had a history of abuse. The man was disabled, so it was a more serious crime.

    Too much violence! Too many bullies taking advantage of their power and control. Not funny 🙁

  6. I didn't see the show. I won't watch it; not my thing. When first I saw that clip, my mouth was open. Speechless. Just unbelievable the crap that goes on tv. If I wanted to see a fight, I'd watch hockey.

    -Joshua

  7. wow. great post. i've heard of the show and watched bits and pieces flipping through the channels and from what i can tell it doesn't have the classyest ppl on there. that said, i don't think that violence should be appropriate in any shape really (except maybe hockey…but that's the point of the sport 😛 ).

    it totally sucks that it's out there though on a regular basis and young kids are being exposed to it, whether it's through mtv or rihanna/chris brown

  8. Oh, dear me. I could rant and rave about the amount of violence in this world, but I won't. I will only say that I am greatly afeared for the future of humanity in general….

  9. I love the surprise kitty.

    As to the rest, no I don't think violence is funny and I don't think it should be treated so lightly. Maybe one punch doesn't seem like a big deal to some, but the problem is it could easily escalate into something more serious (by which I mean serious injury). And for all those out there going on about equal rights, my opinion on this is not restricted to violence against women – it's violence against any living creature (yes I am including animals in this statement).

  10. So I don't watch this kind of tv and don't have a context for the punch, but I'm pretty shocked that this is making the rounds as entertainment. It's hard to imagine a set of circumstances where this would seem like "fun" to watch.

    I couldn't even watch SARAH PALIN getting punched in the face without feeling uncomfortable, and I can't imagine this woman could be any more annoying than that.

  11. For me, I think that no person has any right to touch anyone in a negative way, period. Positive touch is so healing, but when touch twisted into something not well intentioned is so damaging. Peace begins at home and I am doubly reminded of that as child 3 smacks child 4 for being near her. Oh well, the "fight" against violence goes on.

  12. I think people react to some shocking and mildly uncomfortable things with laughter…it happens in horror films.
    I personally dislike reality TV for thsi very reason. Real things happen…sometimes bad things…and it's our entertainment? I don't like it.

    I think the internet give people the bravery to say things they wouldn't out loud…I for one am glad to see someone's true opinions of things…altho I'm sad and dissapointed when they are so vulgar and dissapointing.

    Chivalry ain't dead yet…but sometimes I wonder if things like this are the sign of it…

  13. Not funny (and neither would be girl hitting a guy unless in self-defense) – I think this just shows the general degradation of society. I know that I will not let my girls play violent video games. We own nothing above an 'E' because I truly believe that today's youth is desensitized by what they see and play with. Just my 2 cents –

  14. OK, so if a guy punches another guy in a club, he gets tossed out. But if he punches a girl, he's a hero?!?!?! And this is somehow EQUALITY?!?!?!
    I don't care how obnoxious she was being (and I've seen clips from the show. They're ALL obnoxious!)< she didn't deserve that. NO ONE deserves that!
    And 'roid heads; women, even ones who hang out in clubs, DO NOT exist solely for your sexual edification (it's a big word, you may need to look it up). We ARE allowed to NOT sleep with you, without consequences! So grow the hell up!!!!!

    OK. Now I need to watch the kitty video for the 112th time.

  15. Surprised kitty makes me smile.

    As for the rest of it, I don't even know what to think. If I egg my guy friends on to play fight and get bruises because of it, it's my own fault. Now if anyone actually tried hurt me, they would be all over them. Part of me wants to chalk it up to equality, and part of me wants to say that no one deserves to be hit, period.

    The internet has twisted us, I just don't know if there is any going back. Rly.

  16. I am with Dr. J all the way!

    And yes, I saw that kitty video & way too cute! More of that!!!!

  17. That kitty was the perfect thing to see after a horrible exam…Seriously, that kitty is freaking adorable. Man, I wish I had a cute kitty in my apartment…

    I have nothing to say about the violence, other than I don't like it. At all. And Rihanna is a fool for making violence against women seem 'hot'. So many young girls look up to her, and the last thing they need is a role model that espouses domestic violence….

    Now back to thinking about that cute kitty. Those little paws are so nibble-able.

  18. Wow. I'm surprised by how many people seem to think the punching's ok, or that it's a push towards equality of women and men.

    I completely disagree.

    Guys punching guys is one thing (however unpleasant). But when a guy punches a girl… physically, men are, on average, much stronger than women. It's just the way things work. To use that superior strength harmfully, in a deliberately malicious fashion…

    Might as well go hit a child. But of course, only if they were being annoying before hand, and deserved it.

    …Gah. The whole concept frustrates me.

  19. Me, I'm not at home to Mr. Sympathy.

    I just spent over two hours on the phone with my mother trying to figure out why her printer/scanner wasn't speaking to her computer, and I'm ready to punch my own lights out by this point.

    Though yes, I agree the generally large difference in muscle mass means it's not the same punching a woman in the face as it is a man.

    Pick on someone your own size. And please don't ask them to diagnose — long distance — the problems with your computer. Please.

  20. I totally agree that violence is taken much too lightly nowadays. I think this is because the way stuff like this is portrayed on the internet is done in a humorous way, rather than condemning the action.

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  23. So what's up with all the spam here lately? Seems like that's been a recent thing – what changed?

    As far as punching… I don't know how I feel. One side of me says, very strongly, that men punching women is wrong.

    But another side firmly believes that women and men are equal and there is nothing men can do that women can't do equally as well. That side struggles a bit with this situation – if men and women are equal, then why is it so much worse for a man to hit a woman? I'd like to think it's the size thing. I mean, if a 6'5 pro body builder hit a 5'6 scrawny guy, no matter how annoying the scrawny guy was, people would still feel bothered by it. Right? I'm not honestly sure – and even if they were, I doubt they'd be so outraged as they are over hitting a girl. (Well, some people at least.) I also have a feeling that the mean saying this girl deserved it would not be so insistent if it were a man – more ambivalent, or more "pick on someone your own size."

    If it was just the size difference (men being usually bigger than women), then I suppose it should be taken on a case-by-case basis and this girl is certainly smaller than the guy. But honestly, there is a part of me that has a hard time reconciling outrage at all violence against women, regardless of the circumstances, with believing that men and women are equal.

  24. The thing that seems to be overlooked here is that it's not like she hit him first – he wasn't acting in self-defense. She stood up for herself and told him to leave, and he responded by punching her in the face. Completely not okay and I am disturbed that people actually think this is funny. If we lived in an equal society, I could buy the gender equality arguments, but domestic violence continues to be a HUGE problem in the US and rest of the world.

  25. Janice @ Lazy Mama Fitness

    I'm as confused as you are. It's as baffling as the idiots who comment on women nursing in public.

  26. Dang. I just wrote a paper about violence in movies. Now I'm reading about this in the internet.
    The scary thing about internet is that there is no censorship.

    Dang, I wrote a paper about internet and dignified public forum, too.

    I think I write too many papers…

  27. Rhianna isn't exactly the poster-child for woman. She took him back after he bashed her up. Now she's apparently split up with him again and she's going on tv as some kind of role model for young girls to tell them about abuse. Bull crap. She did exactly what no woman should do. She ran to the police and then took the scum bag back. Sorry, she's no hero to me.

  28. Deb (Smoothie Girl Eats Too)

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    Bottom line: it's a sick world and people are sick and twisted. the end.

  29. Flip the roles and, again, most people would be fine with this story. That's my standard test for equality. To me that just isn't an issue here – either both situations should bother you, or neither.