At first glance you wouldn’t think these two facts would be irreconcilable and, let me assure you, when I was contemplating this, my last pregnancy, I didn’t think they would be. “Nothing will change!” I chirped happily to myself as I slowly felt change creeping over every part of my body. “Okay, so the first tri is hard but if I can just hang in there until the second tri – the “happy tri” – then I’ll be back to my old rip-roaring self” I said through gritted teeth as every workout except for yoga began to feel like an unbearable chore. And then May happened. You may have noticed (or not!) that there was no GFE for May. I tried. I really did. I even came up with a great workout from a celeb trainer who even answered my e-mails! But I couldn’t muster up enough enthusiasm to try it.
I’m going to level with you: I’m feeling fat. I’m tired all the time. Moreover, everything makes me sore. My cardio tolerance is nil. Workouts that were cake 4 months ago, lay me out flat now. It’s all I can do just to show up for my workout every day and do something. Sure, there are good days when I still can get in a 5-mile run and pump some iron. But that’s maybe one day a week. The other 5 days – as the gym buddies can attest – are just doing the bare minimum to get by and then hoping I don’t collapse on the way out to my car. And I’m not the only one. Gym Buddy Allison (22 weeks preggo) is down to 2 days a week in the gym now. I know that pregnancy doesn’t slow some women down at all but for whatever reason it really has me.
Don’t get me wrong, I do feel like exercising is important during this pregnancy. There are many things I love about exercise. First and foremost I get my social time with my friends every day at the gym. I don’t tell them enough but they save me from total insanity on a regular basis. Second, I get those two lovely hours of free babysitting which I desperately need as my youngest has decided to give up napping. Third – and this surprises me – I actually feel pretty good about my body when I’m working out. Yeah, I can’t keep up with my non-preggo friends anymore but yoga pants are very forgiving and when I look in the mirror at the gym, I’m proud that I’m still hanging in there. Fourth, even though the workouts feel hard while I’m doing them, I do feel better after finishing them. I think it does give me some more energy and helps with my mood and I believe that the exercise helps the baby as well (I even have research to back up that last assertion!)
So I’ll keep working out – I haven’t missed a single workout yet! – but I’m afraid that just maintaining the status quo is about all you can expect from me over the next few months. I contemplated doing other Experiments like swimming or eliminating processed food or even cognitive behavioral therapy (because nothing says fun like watching someone write positive mantras 500 times) but it all just made me too tired. Who knows – maybe this will change – but for now I’m going to have to put the experimenting on the backburner.
I feel really bad about this. Not only do I feel like I’m letting you guys down but even moreso I feel like I’ve failed myself. It wasn’t supposed to be this way. I wanted to be one of those women who show the world that pregnancy isn’t an illness and that you can still be the same crazyfunactive girl you were before you became an alien host. Except that I’m not. I’m sorry. I’ll still blog and I hope you’ll still read, even though the experimenting part of The Great Fitness Experiment is temporarily on hiatus. Thanks for your understanding.