So a while ago I confessed my fascination with how athletes “take care of business” during an athletic competition. This fascintation generally takes the form of intrusive questions asked to anyone who will sit still long enough to listen to me. My friend and first-time triathlete P, upon being on the recieving end of my grilling, simply rolled his eyes and said, “What are you – a twelve year old boy?”
And I finally found someone who is not only an accomplished triathlete and Ironman but is also as immature as I am. Possibly more so. (Yeah, I’m jealous.) Exhibit 1
did the running part of his half Ironman dressed as the Grim Reaper, complete with hood and scythe. Who doesn’t love that?
Peeing Into the Wind
My Great Fitness Question (unanswered lo these many months): Did you pee in the lake?
Steve: Yes! Twice!!
Me: I knew it! How could you not? I mean, that’s got to be one of the main motivations of being first, right? Clean water?? Although I suppose you could make a case for it being warmer at the back of the pack. If they fart, you’ve practically got a jacuzzi!
Steve: Plus, on the bike section, I peed in a cornfield. Wanna see?
Me: Did you drink the lake water too?? You sure are well hydrated. And photographic evidence and everything. How very National Geographic of you.
Steve: Oh, and for a bonus, my wife opted to not even get off her bike to pee and just did it right there off her seat.
Me: Thus proving that women are the smarter of the species.
It’s ridiculous how much this entertained me. You can thank me later because I know you’ve been wondering. And yes, for those of you who forgot, we covered pooping during a race
So – out with it: Raise your hand if you’ve done a Tri and peed in the lake. Raise both hands if you’ve ever peed off your bike. And if you’ve ever dropped trou and peed someplace random raise your leg and aim for the hydrant. (You can comment anonymously!) Now if I can just corner Michael Phelps long enough to ask him a question…